The room is almost entirely dark, with the only light coming from the dozens of monitor screens spanning an entire wall. Different videos flicker across them all. There’s one of Carter running through the woods. Another of Beck foraging berries. B-roll footage of camp. At least five screens feature Garrett’s shit-eating grin.
A corkboard on the wall nearest me displays several sticky notes and documents. One of them readsShow Proposal—“Moxley to the Maximum,”and I remember the spinoff show Garrett mentioned he and Blake were planning, starring him and Carter. Barf. The only maximum I’d like to see them receive is a maximum sentence.
Blake is alone in the room, fixed in front of the monitors. She twists around at our entrance.
“Seyoon, there you are. Thank you, Luke,” she says.
Luke nods and exits, shutting the door behind him. Blake gestures for me to join her in front of the screens.
“Neat, isn’t it?” she asks. “Welcome to the editor’s room. Where the magic quite literally happens. We sift through hundreds, if not a thousand hours of footage here.”
Blake reaches for the keyboard and types something in, pulling up a brand-new clip. She doesn’t even need to press play for me to recognize it as the scene from this afternoon, in the treehouse.
The Seyoon on the monitor’s face contorts from stunned hurt to rage in a second, twisted with lines I didn’t even know existed. I self-consciously rub my cheek. Dean looks unfairly composed compared to me. Even when he’s pissed, the only sign is a tick in his jaw and a wrinkle between his brows. He doesn’t wear his heart onhis sleeve like me. I’m the one with a terrible poker face, as he and everyone have pointed out.
Blake turns the screen off with another tap of the keyboard. “I was trying to figure out what caused your lover’s quarrel.”
“It wasn’t a—” I can’t even get myself to say it. My lips flatten. “Me and Dean aren’t actually dating. Garrett told us we should pretend to be in a showmance because it’d help our alliance. But it’s just pretend.”
She hums. “Yes, I know. I told him to suggest it to you guys. I’m glad you were receptive.”
I blink dumbly. “You knew we were just acting this whole time?”
“I did, but the other campers don’t, so no need to worry. That’s what you were hoping for, right? You want to present a unified front. Intimidate the competition.” Blake makes a fist in front of her face to emphasize her point. With her other hand, she presses the keyboard, and my angry, pixelated face pops back on the screen. “This, unfortunately, doesn’t quite present a unified front.”
“You can thank Dean for that,” I grumble. “He’s the one who didn’t want to side with me.”
Blake pulls up another chair and motions for me to sit. I do but squirm. This feels like all those times I’ve been asked to stay after class so the teacher could tell me to “stop disrupting the learning environment.” A.k.a., shut the hell up. She never told any of my equally rowdy male classmates anything, mind you.
Blake sighs. “Have you seen the first season ofForest Feud? No? I don’t blame you. Pilot seasons are always rocky, plus we were one of the first reality game shows to really hit mainstream. We had so much to figure out and learn. Hell, I must have been more nervousthan my contestants.” She laughs. “I remember wondering how things would pan out then, throwing twelve teens in the woods for a few weeks.”
“What happened?” I ask.
“Pretty much the same thing that’s happened this season. Alliances form. Enemies form faster. Somebody has a mental breakdown by week three. These patterns feel predictable now, but back when we were starting, we didn’t know what to expect. I do now, though.” The woman leans forward, her hands crossed tightly and a serious look in her eyes. “There was a showmance in the first season, too. Then the guy started fooling around with another contestant. The girl was understandably upset. They had a big, dramatic falling out in front of everyone. Oh, it was beautiful. Highest-rated episode of that season.”
“And then what?”
“And then they all turned on her. Damnedest thing. The boys sided with the guy, of course, but some of the girls did too. In the original run, we had elimination by votes. She was out that same week. Oh, and don’t get me started on how the viewers tore her up at home.”
I stiffen. “But it was the guy’s fault! He cheated on her!”
Blake throws her hands up. “I know. But he made himself sympathetic. He stayed calm while she screamed and sobbed and cussed him out in front of every camera.” She sits back and lets out a sigh. “Men are allowed to react, but women can only everoverreact. It’s a flawed belief that we see echoed in the audience of every single season. The show, your competitors, the viewers at home—they don’t care about who’s right or wrong. They just want to punish the weak.”
I swallow. My angry pulse throbs in the back of my head. “I’m not weak.”
“I know that. But I also know what happens to girls like you in these situations.” Blake gets up and walks to the other table, grabbing her clipboard. She flips through a few pages, and I spot a film schedule dated for tomorrow. “That’s why I want you and Dean to make amends. We’ll make sure the others are there to see it, too, so they know you’re still together. Still strong.”
The rolling wheels of my chair squeak against the linoleum from how fast I stand up. “What? I’m not apologizing to him. That’s not fair.”
She sets down her clipboard. With a sympathetic smile, like she’s a parent coddling an upset toddler, Blake approaches and pats my shoulder, soothing me. Damnit. It is kind of grounding.AmI acting like a toddler?
I can’t help it. I think it’s part of me. Thisthing. This intrinsicsomethingabout me that makes me unlovable, unlikable, unable to really connect with anyone. Maybe it’s what gotmehere, pulled into the backroom and asked to behave, and not Dean.
When I finally look up, Blake’s eyes are soft. “I know Dean wants to make things right too,” she says.
That catches my attention. “You spoke to him?”
She nods, expression perfectly neutral. “He was only trying to look out for you and make sure you both made it to the next challenge. He cares about you, Seyoon. I can’t force you to reconcile with him, but there were benefits to teaming up with him, weren’t there? Those haven’t gone away. Both of you know this. Think about why you’re here. What you want. You came here to win, right? For your mom?”
