I finish wrapping her up in silence. When I’m done, she pulls her hand back into her lap, inspecting my work. “Why?” she asks. Her voice is like salve on a wound that’s been left open to air too long. I know what she means.
“I told you already. Only one of us can win.”
“And it’s not going to be you. Vendredi did the math. Without my help, you’re going home.”
“I’m good at math, too, Seyoon.”
She finally meets my gaze without a glare. “I don’t understand you. I know you want to win as badly as I do. Wanted to.”
“I thought so, too. But I want something else more.”
“What is it?”
I study her features, wondering if I should tell her after all. My mind helpfully supplies a dozen ways this could go disastrously. Thank you, brain, for defying millions of years of evolution and not developing a self-preservation instinct. It’s terrifying, knowing that Seyoon could hurt me—that I’m giving her the power to. But it’s because of her that I’m the kind of person who can finally speak up. So I do.
“I wish we hadn’t met here. I wish we had more time,” I utter. “That’s what I want. But I can’t have that. So this is the next best thing.” I inch forward. She doesn’t lean away. “Earlier today, I toldyou wewerefriends. Because the truth is, you’ve become more than a friend to me.”
Seyoon’s eyes widen slowly, as if not sure she believes what she’s hearing. “What are you saying, Dean?”
“I’m saying, I lost sight of what was real and what was pretend a while ago.” I gaze down at her lips. Mine turn up in a small, sad smile. “I’m notthatgood of an actor.”
My pulse flutters watching her figure it out. Turn it around in her head. The next time she looks up, she’s the one who has trouble maintaining eye contact for once.
“Dean, I—”
I shake my head to cut her off. I think I’d break if she told me she didn’t feel the same. But it would entirelydestroyme if the answerwasyes. Because it wouldn’t matter—not here, not now.
I lean in for the last time, kissing her forehead. When I pull back, I’m greeted by Seyoon’s stunned silence. I leave the first-aid kit with her and stand up.
“You’re going to win, Seyoon,” I tell her, more confidently than I’ve ever said anything in my life. I smile. “It’s what you do.”
The bonfire seems to crackle more aggressively than it has on other elimination nights. It’s quiet as the sound technicians adjust their boom mics, the set designer spaces the four of us contestants out on the logs, and the camera operator fiddles with the settings on her video camera. The air feels thinner. The night sky is heavier, a blanket over my head, making it hard to breathe.
Before long, Garrett and Blake join us.
And the very last elimination begins.
Campers, I’m torn. On the one hand, nothing fills my heart with more pride than to see the strongest four of you here after an entire season of fighting to prove why you deserve the million-dollar cash prize. On the other hand, in just a moment, we’ll have to say goodbye to one of you.
Before we go over the final scoreboard, let’s review how many points you earned today. Carter, you earned forty. Seyoon, thirty. Vendredi, twenty. And Dean, ten.
Dean, what happened, buddy?
My ears burn from being called out. I hunch in on myself. “Not much of a swimmer.”
Yep, I think we got that. Would’ve been a good time to be in an alliance, but, alas, it’s too late to team up.
Now… dramatic pause. This is the moment that will determine it all. Whether you make it into the top three and have a shot at winning the grand prize. I can see what you guys are thinking.Did I earn enough today to turn things around and shoot to the top of the leaderboard?Or,Have I earned enough in the other challenges to hold on to my top rank despite my subpar performance?
I won’t let you stew in your fears any longer. Luke, reveal the scoreboard.
As Luke turns the board around, my pulse hammers so hard that I can feel it in my teeth.
