“What do you need?”
“Just to lie down.” It was getting hard to think. “And ice, I guess.”
“Come on.”
She took my hand and led me to my bedroom. I was about to protest that she didn’t need to do anything, but my head throbbed again. I lay on the bed, and she disappeared. When she returned, she had an ice pack. I put it on my forehead and closed my eyes.
I could feel her silent presence as she sat on the edge of my bed. After a while—it was hard to tell how long—she scooted closer and put her hand on my chest. I kept hold of the ice pack to keep it in place and laid my other hand over hers.
Her touch was warm and relaxing. The throbbing stopped, although I knew I wasn’t out of the woods. Hopefully my meds would kick in, and between that and resting with ice, I’d be okayby morning. I lost track of time for a while. Maybe I’d fallen asleep. When I came to, Penelope was still there. She’d stretched out and was lying next to me with her hand on my chest. I squeezed her hand, and she shifted a little.
“Do you need anything?” she whispered. “Dinner?”
“No,” I said, my voice low. “I just need to stay here.”
“Okay.”
I felt her settle back on the bed. I wanted to tell her she didn’t need to stay. But it felt so good to have her beside me—just knowing she was there—I couldn’t seem to say it.
The pain continued to recede, but my brain was still fuzzy. All I could think as I drifted off to sleep was one word.
Stay.
And I wasn’t sure if I was thinking about Penelope, or me.
CHAPTER 33
Penelope
I spentthe night with Theo so I’d be there if he needed anything. Not that he did. He slept, and my contribution was mostly to move the ice pack off the bed when it slipped off his forehead.
But I also stayed because it felt good to be close to him.
I woke first and got up quietly in case he still needed to sleep. A little while later, I heard him moving around, and he came out dressed and ready for work. The migraine was gone.
He thanked me for staying with him. I wanted to slip into his embrace and feel his arms around me. But I didn’t. We needed to get to school, and I needed to stop myself from making things complicated.
I wasn’t Theo Haven’s girlfriend, so I shouldn’t act like I was.
School turned out to be more chaotic than usual. The fire alarm went off halfway through third period and we had to evacuate. We stood out in the cold while the fire department investigated. Rumors flew through the student body that someone had pulled the alarm on purpose, but it turned out to be a malfunction. We were given the all clear and slowly filed back into the building.
The rest of the day was an exercise in futility as my fellow faculty and I did our best to move on with our usual schedule. The students’ focus, however, was mostly nonexistent. By the last period of the day, I was ready to give them all crayons and construction paper, as if they were toddlers.
The final bell rang, and I sank into the chair at my desk while the students scurried out of the art room. I took a moment to do nothing but stare at the wall.
Some days are like that when you’re a teacher.
My hesitation meant I wouldn’t catch Theo before he went to practice. But that was probably for the best. Sleeping next to him the night before hadn’t been a sexual thing, but somehow that gave me even bigger feelings.
Not his girlfriend, I told myself again.So don’t act like you are.
Fishing my phone out of my purse to check my messages, I smiled when I saw a text from Melanie. She’d reached out the other day to see if I wanted to get together for coffee, and was confirming that we were still on for that afternoon. I replied that I was looking forward to it.
I had a bit of time to kill, so I got caught up on some prep work and grading. Despite the tiring day, I felt a renewed burst of energy as I packed up to leave my classroom. Regardless of what was going on—or not going on—with Theo, I had a new friend.
It’s possible I was a little bit too excited about that. Being on the shy side made new friendships challenging for me, but it actually felt like Melanie was someone I could hang out with—even once Theo was gone.
The faint sound of the football team practicing filtered over the parking lot as I walked to my car. My heart decided to treat me to a tug of longing, and I let out a sigh. As often as I kept telling myself I could be intimate with Theo without the restof it—without my heart getting involved—deep down, I knew I couldn’t.
