I reach across the table and cover her hand with my own. Her eyes flash up, startled, but then they fill with warmth.
“I don’t think you’re wrong to feel relieved, or wrong to feel guilty. It’s okay to feel conflicting things. It sounds like your brotherdoeshave it covered.”
“Yeah.” She sounds dejected. “It still doesn’t make me feel better. So, here I am, wallowing.” She meets my eyes again. “I’m probably going to wallow for a while before anxiety gets me back to work tonight.” I hear the unspoken question:do you want to stay through my bullshit?
“What do you usually do when you’re sulking?”
She blinks, frowning. “Stare at a wall and contemplate the futility of life.”
“Yeah, fuck that. You like movies?”
“Who doesn’t like stuffing their face with buttery popcorn in a dark theatre where nobody can judge them?”
“Good point. Let’s go catch a movie.”
She arches an eyebrow. “Don’t you have better things to do?”
I haveotherthings to do, but none of them are better. I don’t care if she’s sulking; I’d never forgive myself if I let her suffer alone today. “Nope. You know if anything good is playing nearby?”
“There are reruns of Disney movies at the theatre down the street.”
“Great.” I haven’t watched a Disney movie since I was a kid, and I hated it, but whatever. “Let’s go catch one.”
That’s exactly what we do. Spending time with her feels as natural as breathing.
After wolfing down a massive bucket of popcorn and sitting in the theatre for two hours, watching a bunch of animated figures in an incredibly uncomfortable movie theatre seat, I walk Victoria back home. She looks better than she did earlier, but I’m still hesitant to leave her. So, I accept her invitation to join her for a nightcap.
It’s late now—10pm. While I want to stay and take both of our minds off the bullshit of life, I know I shouldn’t. I’m an asshole, but I won’t take advantage of her when she’s had a hard day. So, I leave her with another kiss, and for the second night in a row, force myself to go back home.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Asher
Victoria rebounds quickly, turning back to her usual, ball-busting self. After our sim session the next day, she approaches me with a serious expression. “I set up lunch for you and Elio today.”
My head jerks back. “What?”
“Yeah. Ilya sent me an email about your conversation yesterday. He also informed me that I’m the new middleman between you and the rest of the team,andtold me I’m now going to be your race engineer during races.” she half-smiles. “You know, I was planning to ask for your car to be upgraded, but it sounds like you beat me to it. And I’m going to help you work through Ilya’s terms.” Another shrug. “I set up a lunch between you and Elio with Amanda. Lucky for you, he has an opening today. Since we’re leaving for the next race tomorrow, I figure it’s best for you to go out with him now. Maybe there’ll be less animosity—”
“No,” I cut her off. “Absolutely not.No. I amnothaving lunch with that asshole.”
“Then how else do you propose to satisfy Ilya’s condition?” She gives me a challenging stare.
I give her a flat one in return. “I’ll figure it out.”
“Will you?” her eyes harden. “Because I think it’s more likely that you’ll keep putting it off until it’s too late. If you’re serious about a podium, you’ll do this.”
…fuck. “Do Ihave to?” I sound like a whiny teenager, but I can’t help myself.
“Yes. It’s not optional. Youwillgo out with Elio in…” she checks the time on her phone. “Ten minutes, and youwillmake an effort with him. Or I’ll stop bending over backwards to try to get you on the podium.”
“There are other ways I’d prefer you bend over backwards for me.”
The tips of her ears brighten, but she remains admirably composed. Idosee the moment she remembers the other day in the pizzeria… and satisfaction eases my postureandmy temper. “Fine. I’ll go with Elio. Where?”
“Amanda has you two booked at some kind of soup-salad-sandwich place. Have fun.”
“I fuckinghatemy assistant,” Elio mutters half an hour later. The restaurant Barbie sent us to is high-end, swamped even at lunch hour, and has a menu made up of bullshit artisanal salads and sandwiches that cost fifty bucks a piece.
