Delilah chuckles. “And long. And I’m willing to betthick—”
“Why are we talking about the guy who broke my heart?” I ask sourly, burying my face deeper into adelightfully fluffy pillow. Traveling with the F1 team has been more comfortable than I imagined—and for this race, they’ve upgraded me from a shoebox room in a nice hotel to a suite. I’m guessing that someone in management wants to keep me happy and on their side.
“From what you’ve said, he’s desperately trying to mend it,” Keith says. “Bringing you coffees every morning? Looking at you like a lovesick puppy? Giving you space even when it’s clearly killing him?” he scoffs. “puh-lease. You’d be stupid not to give him another chance.”
“Keith.” My voice is embarrassingly small. “He passed me up. At the first sign of turbulence, he lashed out and set me aside for his previous engineer—who he hates and calls a moron.”
“He was angry and concussed,” Delilah says. “I’m not saying he shouldn’t work for it, but… even I have to admit, he’s obviously head over heels for you, Vic. Just like you are for him.”
I don’t even bother denying it. My love for him just makes me depressed, because it’s still rooted deep in my soul. I had hoped that it might begin to fade, but it doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.
I do my best to avoid him because looking at him reminds me of what wealmosthad. Of how Ialmostfully let him in, and how he made me pay for it.
“In sum, you’re being a coward. Make him give you a couple orgasms and then give him another chance.”
I’m not being a coward.Am I?
What have the last weeks been, if not cowardice? Hiding from my feelings and succumbing to the fear of being hurt?
But that fear is extremely, profoundly real, and it’s not going anywhere. It’s with me every minute of every day, and each time the thought of giving in crosses my mind, it’s surpassed by the sheer terror of doing so.
“All done.” Keith sits back and examines his handiwork. “Now you just have to let them dry—don’t touch anything, you heathen, you’ll smear them!” he shrieks when I reach up to push my hair out of my face.
“Have I ever told you I love you?” I lower my hand to the mattress, palm-down, smiling.
“Yes, far too often. You’re almost as in love with me as I am. It’s endearing.”
“You’re the best,” I chuckle.
“But she can’t be as in love with you as she is dickmatized by Asher Lawrence.” Delilah flips a page in her book. “He must givereallygood oral.”
“So, qualifyings tomorrow.” Keith thankfully shifts the subject. “Will you forgive Asher then, or wait until after race-day?”
“I’m not forgiving him.” My mood plummets right back to sadness at the rawness of my soul. “God, Iwantto, but…”
“You’re a coward,” Keith surmises.
“And you’resucha bitch,” I mumble.
“Proudly so,” Keith agrees. “I give her until tomorrow night to forgive him.”
“Really?” Delilah laughs. “I was going to put money on after race-day.”
“Shall we do our usual amount?” Keith inquires politely.
My head snaps up. “There’s ausual amount?”
“No. I just got fired, so let me find a job first,” Delilah says—
Wait,what?
“Thefuck you say?” Keith asks.
“Back up,” I shriek, shooting into a sitting position. “You got—”
“Fired. The partner got sick of me denying him, so he gave me the boot.” Delilah’s tone is casual, but I detect a note of concern. She was the youngest and most promising senior associate at her firm… and they just kicked her out?
“Is that evenlegal?” I ask.
