“That’s the story I tell people. My job isn’t a secret—the assignments are, of course—but I’m asked too many questions when I say the truth.”
“This is crazy, Jarrett.” She flopped into the cushioned chair by the desk.
“I know, but it’s all true.” He scratched his shoulder. “Most of my scars are from undercover jobs. The faded, smaller ones are from street fights before the feds recruited me.”
Fights? She shook her head, torn between wanting to hug him and slap him for his stupidity. “What were you going to steal—money? Before you were arrested, I mean.”
He winced. “Money, yeah. I lost my job at a retail store and then caught my girlfriend having sex with another guy. I was desperate for a hit, something to dull my senses, so I robbed the store. After I ran off, I was disgusted with myself. I planned to return the cash, but the cops nabbed me before I could.”
“Did you love her?”
“No, not even close, but she hurt my pride. I haven’t had a girlfriend since.”
“You’ve been too busy staying clean and working for the feds?”
“Exactly. For the past year, I’ve lived and breathed a lie with the Consuelo crime family. I’ve learned some Spanish and even befriended the head honcho himself. After the shit hit the fan, as you said, Arlo Consuelo set his price. I’m worth a million dollars to him dead.”
A million? Bile rose in the back of her throat. “You mean the founder of Consuelo Hotels, one of the richest men in New Mexico?”
“The hotel business is legit, but he operates it as a front for his other activities. The DEA recently arrested his heirs, along with several key players in the organization, and they’re zeroing in on Consuelo and his bodyguards. That’s why I’m not worried about him finding me. His main concern should be staying undetected and saving his crumbling empire, not searching through mountains of cyber paperwork to get back at me.”
She arched her eyebrow.
A tic erupted in his jaw. Jarrett retrieved his fallen knife and ran his finger along the serrated blade. “Let’s say a few years pass. Arlo Consuelo avoids detection and rebuilds his empire. He’ll have enough time and resources to find me, but since he already set a price on my head, I’ll either be dead or deep in the Witness Protection Program.” He snatched a leather holster from under a pillow, sheathed the knife, and buried it in his pack. “I know how this man thinks. He doesn’t believe he’ll survive the DEA’s manhunt. The bounty is his only way of revenge.” He knelt beside Marissa and placed his hand on her jittery knee. “You’re safe. I swear it.”
Tears slicked hot trails down her cheeks. She wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in the crook of his shoulder. “What you must have gone through, I’m so sorry.”
“Shh.” He leaned back and placed his finger over her trembling lips. “It was my choice. I volunteered to go undercover. The Albuquerque office needed someone from out of state, someone Consuelo or his goons wouldn’t already be aware of.” He pulled the billfold from her grasp and slid it into his pants pocket. “Since I joined the agency, my supervisors refused to assign me cocaine-related cases. I wanted to prove I could deny my addiction, so Ackermann, my mentor and group supervisor, convinced the bosses on my behalf. The agent in charge of the San Francisco division arranged for a temporary transfer to the Albuquerque office.”
“Did you prove yourself?”
“Yes, I refused every opportunity. After Consuelo learned about my addiction from guys lower down the pole, he accepted me into his private fold because he appreciated people who didn’t mix business with pleasure.” He thumbed away her tears.
She nuzzled her face against his hand. “Are you happy with this job?”
“I love the adrenaline and challenge, that I’m making a difference, but sometimes it feels like I’m running in circles. I mean, Consuelo’s competitors are now fighting each other for rights of his territory, so did I really change anything?” He shuttered his eyes and rested his forehead on hers. “The constant lies are draining. Once you repeat the same story, again and again, it’s hard not to believe it.”
“It hardens you.”
“Yeah.” He feathered kisses along her brow. “Even when things go sideways, I never lose sight of my main objective or who I am inside the character I’m playing. I choose to do everything I do.”
“Even kill people?”
“Yes. Luckily, the only lives I’ve taken belonged to men who tried to kill me first. They were irredeemable scum—rapists and murderers. Men like that don’t deserve to live, especially if they’re prone to rape or kill again for the hell of it.” He licked his lips. “I’ve never killed innocents or in cold blood, Marissa.”
She brushed her hand across the light stubble on his cheek. “I’m still sorry. It must have been hard.”
“It was to some degree. A life is still a life.” He straightened to his full height and moved across the room. “Now that you know the truth, what do you think of me?”
“Oh, Jarrett.” His stoic gaze chipped away at the barrier guarding her heart, but the tension radiating from him surrounded him like a suit of armor. How could she get through to him? “I think you’re a stronger man than I realized. You’re a decent, honorable person who gets his hands dirty for the betterment of others. You have a good heart.”
He turned and shook his head.
She hurried to him and gripped his shirt. “Your life is difficult, but you’re still a beautiful person. You conquered an addiction that’s plagued you since you were sixteen. You chose a career that saves lives and came back home because it was the right thing to do. And you love me. How can you not be beautiful to me?” The tears welling in his eyes stole her breath. She kissed him, claiming him, trying to prove how much she needed him. He clasped her close as she slid her tongue into his warm mouth. Yum! His minty taste ricocheted through her. She pulled back and gripped his broad, stiff shoulders. “I love you too. We can work through this. Let me help.”
“I’ll stay for as long as it’s safe, but I’ll leave if it means keeping you and Jason alive. Once the feds arrest Consuelo and his men, we can start over.”
She swallowed the lump in her throat. “You claim you’re safe from Arlo Consuelo, but what if some random assassin finds you or your family? That horrible man set the bounty for someone else to do his dirty work, right?”
