Matt tilts his head. Yeah, I maybe went overboard.
“Can I have the car?”
Oliver sighs, but hands over the keys. I need to get away. I don’t even know where. But right now I just know one thing. I will not sit here waiting to find out what fate holds for me.
Chapter Thirty One
Surprise Company and Sincere Confessions
Nick
My doorbell rings. I groan, throwing a pillow over my head. I’m too tired for this. Ijustgot back from reliving my worst nightmare a thousand times, explaining to internal affairs why I had to kill a man. And not just any man, a friend who I failed to recognize as a killer. I’d be more upset about that part if I hadn’t realized it was a pattern for me.
It rings again. Then again.What the fuck?
I swear to god if it’s someone trying to tell me about Jesus, I’ll make sure they get a private meeting with Him today.
I stalk to the door, getting out of the warm cocoon I’d created to sulk in peace. I snatch the door open.
It’s not someone selling me on Jesus.
An Elliot with storm clouds on his face instead. I thought I’d seen him angry before. Hell, vaguely angry is his default. This was furious.
“What are you doing here?” leaves my mouth in a whoosh. Of all the people in the world, I didn't expecthimto be standing here right now, knowing everything he does. What the fuck is wrong with him?
He scowls harder and stomps inside. I close the door behind me and slump against it. If I didn’t have energy forJesus, I sure as hell can’t dothisright now. In fact, I’m still pretty sold on my previous plan ofneverdealing with this.
“You don’t even have the courtesy to come and arrest me yourself? I've been waiting all night for someone to show up. Matt, yoursecret agent colleague, doesn't even know that I killed those people. So what? You were waiting to arrest me yourself, or is there a team coming later to catch me unaware?”
My jaw drops. Is heangrywith me right now? What right does this fucking stupid man have to come here and accuse me of what?Not arrestinghim? After everything he did to me? Lying for months, he has the audacity— I fist my hands and take a deep breath. I can still get away with not dealing with it.
“No one is going to arrest you,” I try for a calm tone, but it comes out as a growl.
He tilts his head. “Oh, yeah, why is that, Nicholas?” He continues to goad me like that’s a wise decision. “Must be something solid for you to decide that. You in love with me or something?” he throws at me, his words dripping in venom.
I blow out a breath and take a step toward him. I laugh in his face. It sounds cruel even to my ears. “You know what I see here? You were worried about getting arrested. You thought someone was coming, and soon, considering everything you’ve done. You knew everything. You had time to make a run for it. No one was stopping you. But you're here at my house, asecretagent and a detective. Why is that, Elliot? Are you in love with me or something?”
His breathing gets louder, heartbeat picks up. Not unusual around me, now that I think of it. The need to grab him and pull him against my chest overtakes, but I resist.
I need to hear it. I'm done with his bullshit. He came here to me. I let him go. I did what he wanted, what he wanted all along. Hell, Ikilledfor him. Like I even had a choice then. Watching that claw so close to him, I’d have burned the entire world down if it meant getting it away from him.
I take another step toward him. “I didn’t know if I couldforgive you for making me kill, for making me lie to everyone I love. And I knew I couldn’t watch you walk around like nothing happened. Like I don’t mean anything. So, I let you go. And now you’re back? For what Elliot? Reminding me that everything we had was casual and I’m a fool for falling for you? Laugh at my face this time instead of doing it behind my back?”
He swallows. I push in harder. “But you’ve known all along what I was, haven’t you?Ididn’t. Butyou? You riskedeverything, and for what? A casual hookup? I don't buy it.” I take another step toward him. “You're not stupid,clearly. So what is it, Elliot? Is my dickthatgood? That you couldn't stay away?”
He opens his mouth, but no words come out. I wait him out. He sighs, closing his eyes. “Itisyour dick.” I start to roll my eyes. But he continues, “And your stupid smile… And the way you careso fucking much. It's so annoying. You make me feel seen, safe. No one has ever done that. So yeah, if anyone is going to do it, I want it to be you, because I— I love you,” he says in one breath.
I stare at him, my wolf tugging me towards him. I resist.
“Say something,” he pleads. When I don’t, his face falls. “I didn’t know this would happen. I never wanted to hurt you, Nicholas. I can’t—can you at least believe that? I didn’t even know you were looking into my cases. And I didn’t know I would like you this much. I gave it all up and a big reason was you. I know I don’t deserve you. Iknowthat. So, I’m not asking for that. Not for forgiveness either. Just please—-please believe me,” his eyes water.
I can't take any more. I close the gap between us and pull him into a punishing kiss. Our teeth clash, our tongues fight for dominance. It’s not pretty, but my restless and lost werewolf calms. I pull him closer to feel his warmth against me. Much better than my blanket cocoon.
“It would take me some time, but I believe you. And I don’t regret it. Any of it,” I say when we part for air.
He nods jerkily.
“You’re not going to any prison, just so you know,” I tell him and kiss him again. “But you’re not going anywhere now. I have a duty after all.” His eyes widen. “You're going to stay with me. You lost yourlast chanceto leave.”
