Fuck. He needed to get his shit together. And he definitely had to get his fucking infatuation under control, because he was absolutely certain the quickest way to ruin everything was for Vincent to realize he was developing feelings.
He sipped a bit more of his tea before dumping the rest in the sink and heading up to bed. All he wanted was a quick shower and to pass out, but the sound of sharp voices brought him up short, years of avoiding drawing attention to himself making him freeze.
“—to get over your problem with Jas,” Keithsaid.
“Over it,” Matt snapped.
“Really. ’Cause you’ve been a dick to him for weeks.”
Matt’s sneer was evident when he said, “He deserves it for getting involved with that motherfucking bastard!”
Jasper nearly jumped at the venom in Matt’s voice, a twinge of unease tightening his stomach. He’d assumed Matt was pissed that Vincent had dumped him, but that was a lot of hate to hang on to for so long if that’s all it was.
“Still being a dick.”
Matt snarled something under his breath, and Jasper couldn’t resist inching closer to hear despite the nervous pounding of his heart.
“Don’t you think it’s time to let this grudge go?” Keith sounded like he was getting irritated.
“You don’t know what all he did!”
“How can I when you’ve never trusted me enough to tell me?” Keith shouted back.
Jasper flinched. He really shouldn’t be listening anymore. His room was only a few steps away, but Keith’s door was open, and if he moved now they’d definitely know he’d been listening.
Matt let out a frustrated, wordless yell, and then silence.
Keith sighed and sounded weary when he spoke again. “You know I love you, so don’t take this the wrong way when I say I can’t deal with this right now.”
Shit, shit, shit.
Jasper tensed as he heard someone moving towards the door, standing still and hoping if it was Matt that he turned and went farther down the hall. Of course as soon as Matt stepped out, their eyes met.
Matt’s eyes were bright and red-rimmed. He stared at Jasper a moment before a twisted smirk settled on his lips, his voice eerily calm when he said, “Whatever you think you have with him, it means nothing to him. He’ll take what he wants and leave you for others to break whatever’s left.”
Jasper blinked, hardly able to think of a response. He slumped against the wall as Matt’s door slammed behind him, rubbing a hand against his chest, trying to steady his rapid heartbeat. What little comfort he’d gotten from Keith was shattering under Matt’s absolute certainty that Vincent would never care. Somehow this felt different from all the other times Matt said Vincent was a dick and not worth Jasper’s time.
Maybe he’d deluded himself by thinking there could be something between them. Everything seemed to become sort of hazy and surreal when he was with Vincent. Like time stopped existing until they had to part ways. That was probably because he was seeing everything through lust-colored glasses.
He shoved off the wall towards his room, ignoring Keith calling him, and shut his door.
This was fine. He’d known from the start this was nothing more than a fling. He could deal with that. Take what he could and learn from it. If nothing else, he’d at least discover a few new kinks before the end.
Even telling himself that, he couldn’t shake the doubt that seemed to grow by the hour and the day. His nerves twisted themselves into knots so tight he could barely pay attention in class or eat. By the time Friday came around, he’d managed to stress himself sick. And for once, the thought of seeing Vincent didn’t spark joy, so like a complete and utter ass, he sent a text saying he wasn’t feeling well and asking if they could skip this weekend.
The response came a few minutes later, a simple:Do you need anything?
Which only added guilt to his already muddled emotions. If Vincent were really as bad as Matt said, he did an amazing job of pretending to care.
No just going to sleep it off sorry
Then he turned his phone off, and when he failed to lose himself in his assigned readings, he went to bed.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
VINCENT STAREDat his phone with a frown, completely willing to blame it for the fact there were no new messages from Jasper. It was still early, far too early to be awake on a Saturday, but having his weekend disrupted meant no Jasper in his bed, which meant he’d slept as poorly as usual. He knew he shouldn’t read more into a text than what was there, but Jasper’s last message seemed off. And since hedefinitelyknew he shouldn’t assume the worst, he sent a text asking if Jasper was feeling better and if he needed anything.
That done, he dragged himself out of bed and dressed. With his weekend plans shot, he took his time making breakfast and drained three cups of coffee. Not like there wasn’t plenty of work he could do, but he wasn’t feeling it.
