Theo leans closer. “We go with them or we fight our way out.”
“I vote to go with,” I say. “Because arguing with weaponized glitter feels like a poor life choice.” Another nudge follows, sharper this time, and I sigh. “Fine. Lead the way, sparkly overlords.”
Sir Sweeps-A-Lot drifts closer to my side, bristles puffed like he’s preparing for battle.
“Don’t,” I whisper. “You will lose.” He pauses before lowering himself. Smart broom.
We fall into line. Not by choice but by design, surrounded on all sides by creatures that move with a single, seamless intent. I glance at Gwyneth, who meets my gaze with something unreadable flickering in her eyes.
“Well, sister, this is new.”
“Yes,” she replies.
“On a scale of one to disaster?”
She considers it for a moment. “Undetermined.”
I nod, lifting my chin as we’re escorted deeper into whatever this is. “Excellent. My favorite kind.”
The horses don’t seem too bothered. They must be close descendants, right? Like unicorn adjacent? Wait. Does that mean unicorns also eat faces? I eyeball one as it drifts close enough to touch. I tilt, knowing Theo will hold me. He does, and my fingers brush over the velvet fur.
The unicorn turns to glare at me. “Rude,” it snaps. “You didn’t even ask before you laid your hands on my body.”
My cheeks heat. “I do apologize. You’re right. Unauthorized, unwelcome touching is a crime.”
“It should be,” it snaps.
The way its lips move and teeth snap makes all my previous hangups about the nature of horses come back with reinforcements.
They don’t take us far, which my floof is thankful for.
“I’m going to need you to let up on the floof thoughts unless you have fantasies about being taken in a circle of unicorns,” Theo says.
“You know, it didn’t make it into my top ten.”
“I’ll be very, very interested to learn what did.”
“I won’t be,” Charming grumbles. Ugh, he’s still here? Didn’t the unicorns make a meal out of him yet?
The trees part into a clearing that looks untouched by the rest of the world. No broken branches. No tracks. No sign that anything violent has ever dared to occur here. The grass grows softer beneath the horses’ hooves, thick like a bed of moss, and the light filters down in a way that makes everything glow.
It would be peaceful if not for us being escorted by a heavily horned herd of magical creatures with opinions on touching policies.
“Good news,” I murmur, taking in the space as more unicorns emerge from the edges, not aggressive but present. Watching. Waiting. “This feels less like an execution and more like a holding cell with better lighting.”
“Stay alert,” Nash says quietly.
“I am always alert,” I reply. “I simply choose to express it through chaos.”
“That is not helpful.”
“It keeps me sane.”
He snorts. “Debatable.”
The larger unicorn steps forward again, positioning itself at the center of the clearing. The rest fan out behind it, forming an intentional barrier between us and the path we came from. I don’t think we’re leaving unless they say so.
“What now?” I whisper. The staring creeps me out. It’s worse because I know at least one of them can talk.
