Because he gives me orgasmsis probably not the best defense.
Hart rolls his eyes as he takes a bite from a cake. Lemon, I believe. I’ve not sampled that one yet. Hart smirks and pushes his plate over to me, with half the cake still on it. Orgasms and cakes. This knight knows how to seduce a maiden.
“So where is your god?” Nash asks.
The hare freezes and locks eyes with Hatter, who shakes his head. “It wasn’t your fault, my friend. He followed you to see the caterpillar of his own free will. That was on him.”
All eyes shift to the hare. What did he do? He darts under the table, making the plates rattle.
The hatter sighs. “The only way through Wonderland is to traverse the Red Queen’s kingdom.”
“What is he doing?” Theo interrupts as he catches a shaking teacup before it makes a break for it off the table.
“Searching for his marbles, I suspect,” the White Rabbit declares.
I blink at him. He’s been so quiet I almost forgot he was here. The dormouse has resumed snoring with his head on the table. Apparently, we don’t make for interesting company. I blame Charming. He brings the tone of our amazing gang down.
The hare brushes against my legs, making me giggle. Poor thing really is searching for his marbles. I shove my chair out and sink to my knees. Sir Sweeps-A-Lot moves with me, clearly keen to aid us.
“Daphne, what are you doing?” Nash hisses.
“Helping the hare look for his marbles, of course.”
For a smart knight, he really misses the obvious. I lift the tablecloth and crawl underneath on the cool grass. The hare plucks at the grass, one blade at a time, his floppy, soft ears skimming the ground as his wide eyes dart around.
“How many have you lost?” I ask him.
He shakes his head. “At least eleven, possibly twenty-three.”
Sir Sweeps-A-Lot combs through the grass as I run my hands through the blades. My fingers brush against a cool glass ball. I grab it and hold it in front of the hare. “Is this one?”
He snatches it from my hands and swallows the entire thing whole. His eyes droop and he sighs. “Thank you. That shall suffice.”
I back out from under the table, and the hare mirrors me until we are both back in our seats.
The hatter leans forward and squints at me. “You are you.”
“I am,” I agree. “Who else would I be?”
“Who else indeed?” he answers.
“While I live for Daphne’s calamities, I cannot cope with riddles,” Hart says.
Theo sneezes, and his dragon tail tears through his breeches and lashes against a tree, ripping the bark from it.
Everyone freezes. Theo shrugs. “I’m rolling with it at this point.”
“How do we get to the Red Queen’s kingdom?” Gwyneth asks.
The hatter shudders. “Why would you want to go to such a place? The Red Queen is wrathful and quite insane. You are more likely to lose your head than find your way.”
Umm. I’m rather attached to my head. “You said it was the only way through Wonderland.”
“Stay. Drink tea and eat cake,” the hatter declares.
“I agree,” the White Rabbit adds.
I shake my head. As much as tea and cake are appealing, that doesn’t fix our problems. If it did, we wouldn’t even be in this situation.
