Grinning, she rolls her eyes. “Sucha troublemaker, helping out your brother with his preschooler’s field trip to the ranch. You’re really good with kids.”
“So are you.” I tilt my head. “Maybe that’s an angle to think about. You were definitely lit up hanging with those cuties.”
Her eyelashes flutter. “Maybe. I hadn’t considered that. I’d have to go back to school to teach?—”
“No, no. I don’t mean teach like in a classroom. Maybe you figure out a way to work with kids and horses and stuff. You gotta be outside, working with people. And animals.”
What about the animal therapy?I loved it as a kid, and I vaguely remember my instructors being pretty gung ho about the whole thing.
I make a mental note to come back to the idea. Maybe I’ll bring it up to Billie later, after I’ve had some time to flesh out the thought.
“You sound like you know me.”
“Darlin’, I do know you. And I know you’re never gonna be satisfied sitting at a desk for the rest of your life.”
She wrinkles her brow, nostrils flaring as her eyes flick to my mouth. “Remind me again why you care?”
’Cause you’re something special, and it’d be a fucking tragedy to see you wither away trying to keep everyone happy.
“These days, caring aboutanythingfeels like giving this fucked up world the finger. And I’m learning from you the power of a little rebellion.”
Her face splits into a smile so pretty it takes my breath away.
Literally. I can’t breathe. I can only stare, wanting to lean in and kiss her so bad my chest hurts.
“Are you saying I’m a punk?” she asks.
“And a brat. Yes. But I’ll take that any day over?—”
“Someone who’s full of shit.”
“Yes.”
Her throat works on a swallow. “Ry?”
“Yeah?”
Ask me to kiss you. Please. Anywhere you want.
“Are we… Is this how friends talk?” Billie’s voice wobbles. “Because I don’t really have friends, I only have brothers. And this feels different. Not—not in a bad way, but I… If I’m being honest…being more than friends…I’d be okay with that.”
Her words send an arrow through my heart. She’s feeling this tension, this desire, same as me. I wanna give her a high five for having the balls to acknowledge it.
But that means I gotta decide, right now, what my next move’s gonna be. No more of this wishy-washy, I-wanna-eat-her-out-but-I-can’t crap. Either I jump in with both feet, or I don’t jump at all.
Could I be good to Billie? Treat her the way she deserves to be treated? I’ve hooked up casually in the past, but I was never anyone’s boyfriend. I don’t know how dating is done or if I’m even capable of things like monogamy and truthfulness.
Because Billie is telling the truth, and I owe it to her to do the same.
Truth is…
I don’t know.And there’s too much at stake to fuck around without having a solid game plan in place.
A shadow descends inside me, cloaking my good mood in a blanket of doubt.
My voice sounds like gravel when I say, “You have friends, Billie. I’m one of ’em.”
Her gaze flickers. Awshit, I hurt her feelings. That was not the answer she wanted to hear.
