I opened my mouth, then closed it before I tried again. “What do you want me to say?” My voice was too hoarse, but I couldn’t clear my throat.
His gaze searched mine. “Anything.”
A sharp giggle tittered out of me. “You want me to say something? Me? You…you’re engaged?”
“I am.”
The blow his words landed knocked the wind out of me. My fingers eased off the arms of the chair. “How long?” I heard myself ask as if I didn’t already know the answer or that it would somehow change things.
“Shortly after I ascended.” Caden looked away, his gaze fixed on the window. “It was…” A muscle flexed along his jaw. “It’s what’s best for… The Court wants their King and Queen united,” he replied, his voice monotone. “I am their King. It is my duty to serve them.”
I stared up at him, anger slow to break through the disbelief, but it was there, heating my skin and my blood. “Was it the best for your Court when you fucked me yesterday?”
Caden’s shoulders tightened.
“Twice?” Anger solidified the muscles in my legs. I stood.
“I told you before that there could be nothing between us,” he said.
“Yeah, and then you fucked me—”
“I didn’t fuck you.” His gaze shot to mine, and those amber eyes now burned. “That is not what we did.”
“It’s not? What the hell do you call screwing someone who is not the person you’re engaged to.”
“It was…” He looked away again. “It should not have happened. Yesterday is on me. Not you. You did nothing wrong.”
“IknowI didn’t do anything wrong. I’m not fucking engaged to someone else.”
“All I can say is that I’m sorry, Brighton.”
“You’re sorry?” My chest felt as if it were caving in on me. “Which part are you sorry about? What happened between us? Or the fact that you failed to mention that you’re engaged?”
His jaw flexed once more. “All of it.”
My heart fissured into millions of pieces. I’d been a lot of things in my life, but I’d never been a mistake. I’d never been a mistake with the same person twice. What did my mom use to say when I was younger? “Fool me once. Shame on you. Fool me twice. Shame on me.”
“You don’t understand.” He glanced at me. “You cannot possibly understand—”
“Because I’m not a fae?”
His eyes met mine, and an eternity stretched between us as a wild array of emotions flickered across his face. And then it all went away as if he’d shut down whatever he was feeling. “Yes, because you are not like me. I am a King. I must have a Queen, and you… You’re a distraction. A weakness that I will not allow to be exploited.”
I jerked back a step. Deep, wounding hurt collided with fury. My legs knocked into the chair. Thrown off balance, I stumbled. Caden stepped toward me, reaching out.
“Don’t touch me!” The sound of my voice was shrill to my ears as I straightened myself. A burn crawled up the back of my throat and then entered my eyes. “Don’t ever touch me again.”
Caden—no, he wasn’t Caden. He wasthe King, and I shouldn’t forget that. The King pulled his hand back, and our gazes connected once more. The pressure in my chest continued to expand until it felt like something might burst.
And then words did break free of me. “I want to tell you I hate you. I want to tell you that I despise you, but you would know that it’s not true.”
He remained quiet, and a long moment passed between us as a hundred quick, in-complete thoughts flashed through my mind, forming all the things I thought I wanted to say to him.
But only one fully formed.
“I never once thought you were terrible for all the things you did while under the Queen’s spell. I hated that you held yourself responsible for things you had no control over. It killed me a little, but this….” A shudder racked me. “You did this. You led me on the first time, and you did it again. No, you didn’t make me any promises, but you know me better than most. You knew before yesterday that it was going to mean something to me. And you turned around and made me the other woman. You made me feel shame and regret, and for all of that, I think you’re terrible.”
The King closed his eyes.
