My hands curl into fists. Not because she’s wrong, but because she’s leaving. Because everything in me wants to pull her into my arms and make her swear she’s mine and that she’s staying. Because I remember her mouth on mine, the way she tastes, her warmth against my skin.
But I also know forcing her to stay would be the fastest way to make her want to leave for good.
I let my gaze move over her face, her mouth, the dark circles of weariness under her eyes. She’s hurt. She’s tired. I wonder if she slept at all last night.
And it’s all because of me.
I hate myself for it.
Andrei rises from his seat. “You can’t leave without security,” he says. “It’s not safe.”
She lifts her chin defiantly, the determination back in full force. “I’ll be fine.”
Andrei’s gaze flicks to me, silently asking me for permission to insist on it.
I should. I should stop her. I should lock this house down the way I’ve always locked everything down. But if I do that, if I stop her now, I’ll be proving every fear she has about me; that she’s a prisoner, an asset, that she’s trapped here because I say so.
My chest burns with frustration.
“Let her go,” I tell Andrei.
Amalie’s eyes widen just a bit. She didn’t expect such an easy release.
Andrei’s jaw tightens. “Roman?—”
“Let her go,” I repeat. “But she leaves with a driver and two men to wherever she wants to be dropped off.” She opens her mouth, likely to argue. I cut her off with a look. “If you want to leave, then so be it. But I will make sure your exit is safe.”
She presses her lips together. She doesn’t fight it. “Okay. Thank you.”
I nod once.
She hesitates at the doorway, a tiny falter in her resolve, as if she wants to say something else or is having second thoughts.
Whatever it is, she pushes it down. Instead she says, “Tell Sasha I love him.”
The wordloveslips into me like a blade between the ribs. There’s no doubt in my mind she feels that way toward my son. And he feels it for her, too.
She turns and leaves before I can respond. When she’s gone, the room feels emptier than it should, as if she took something else with her beyond just her presence.
Andrei exhales. “You trust her.”
My gaze remains on the doorway, on the place where she stood just a moment ago.
“I really want to.”
CHAPTER 29
AMALIE
After several minutes of arguing, Roman’s guards reluctantly let me out of the car at the nearest train stop.
The doors sigh open and the platform air hits me like a slap, the familiar cold, metallic scent I always associate with the El. I step out with my overnight bag digging into my shoulder, my brain replaying the events of last night over and over.
Sasha’s face was the worst part. Not the sirens, not the CPS investigators with their clipboards marching through Roman’s home. Not even Roman’s eyes when he looked at me with an expression that made it clear he didn’t trust me.
Only Sasha.
The way he’d clung to Roman’s coat. The way his little voice was thin with confusion. The way he’d looked at me like he was hoping I had all the answers, that I could keep him safe.
