I felt my anger stirring at even the image my mind was conjuring up of all the things Marcus had done to Aleks, and it took all of my power to focus on the road in front of me. But of course, I couldn’t stop sending glances Aleks’s way, mostly because he wasfingering the hem of my shirt. The move was distracting the hell out of me, but I knew Aleks wasn’t even aware of it. He was clearly nervous and I couldn’t really blame him. It was probably only now registering with him what he’d done by choosing to stay with me rather than go home. I half expected him to beg me to take him home.
Which I would.
As badly as I wanted to keep him safe, I hadn’t considered what my actions would do to him. I also knew he’d only chosen me over his brother to keep Dante and the rest of his family safe.
I said I believed you but that doesn’t mean I trust you. I don’t… not anymore. Not ever again, Vaughn.
Fuck, that had hurt.
Still did.
We’d gotten back on the road nearly an hour earlier and Aleks had yet to speak to me. He hadn’t even asked me what was going to happen next. I thought maybe it was because he didn’t trust me to tell him the truth, but I was starting to wonder if there wasn’t another reason for his silence.
Just like he’d reverted to believing Marcus was alive when I’d tried to untie him earlier, maybe he was relying on the behavior that had kept him alive in the past.
Don’t speak unless spoken to.
Don’t ask questions.
Don’t talk back.
It was likely an endless list of hard-learned lessons and I hated that he was associating any of them with me.
Another hour passed in silence. The sun was just starting to come up over the horizon when we reached the interstate.
“Do you want to stop for something to eat before we get on the interstate?” I asked. “I need to get gas anyway.”
Aleks’s right hand moved to his mouth so he could chew on his fingernail. He shook his head. “No, thank you… sir.”
I actually jerked the wheel a bit when he called me that. If he’d called me “sir” in a snide tone to prove he was pissed at me, I would have been relieved because it meant he feltsomething. But he’d addedit so naturally… like when he’d addressed any one of Marcus’s colleagues that he’d either encountered at the mansion or at one of the few outside events Marcus had taken him to.
I found myself pulling the car over to the side of the road because I was so disturbed I found it hard to breathe. I wrapped both hands around the steering wheel and held on like it was my lifeline.
Because if I didn’t, I’d take my anger out on the damn thing and Aleks didn’t need to see that.
I had no clue how long we sat there for because I lost track of things. My mind was reliving every moment where I could have gotten Aleks out of that fucking mansion sooner. I could have done it the very night I’d spoken to him for the first time.
But no, I hadn’t been able to risk it back then.
What if I had? Would we even be here now? Would things have been better for Aleks if I’d just given in to the temptation?
“Vaughn.”
I startled as I realized Aleks was calling me, his voice sounding strangled. I turned to look at him. I expected to see him cowering against the car door, but he wasn’t. His hands were in his lap and he was watching me, a look of concern on his face.
Concern?
For me?
At least he’d called me by my name.
The rage and regret were still too strong to make it possible for me to respond to him.
“I’m sorry, Vaughn. I shouldn’t have called you that. You… you don’t deserve that. It’s a habit—”
“Aleks,” I practically croaked.
He stopped talking and dropped his eyes. I couldn’t help but reach for his face, though I only touched his chin briefly so that he’d look at me, because I didn’t trust myself to have any kind of extended contact with him. Not to mention I didn’t want to cause any kind of discomfort by coming into contact with the bruises the men who’d abducted him had left on him. “You don’t owe me any kind of explanation… or apology,” I said firmly.
