I laughed and said, “This is true. If you haven’t figured it outyet, in my family you say what you’re thinking. Anyway, Reese didn’t need any kind of help when it came to his skillset.”
I didn’t want to expound on the subject. As accepting as Everett was that his son was part of a vigilante group, I doubted he needed to know his child was an extremely capable killer.
“I was a little worried about Reese at first,” I admitted.
“How so?” Everett asked.
“As strange as it sounds, in this line of work you have to have a certain measure of empathy. For the victims, mostly, but sometimes even for the perpetrators. I mean, just because something looks a certain way on paper doesn’t mean that’s how it really is. You have to be able to make decisions about your subject while you’re working the case. I was worried that Reese was so detached that he wouldn’t be able to focus on anything but waiting for the kill order to come through.”
“Jesus,” Everett whispered.
“The first cases we worked were pretty cut and dry – surveillance and protection, mostly. But our third case together was tracking down a man who’d kidnapped his daughter. He’d lost custody to his ex after she’d accused him of sexually abusing the little girl while they were still married. The guy managed to disappear completely, so the cops couldn’t find him. We got intel that the guy was living in Seattle, so Reese and I got the case. There was physical proof the girlhadbeen abused, so Reese was itching to get in there and just finish the job. Terminate the dad, get the girl to safety. But the more we watched the father and daughter together, the more Reese began saying something was off. I’d sensed the same thing, but I let him take the lead in telling our team leader, Memphis, his suspicions. Memphis had us grab the father and daughter and take them to a safe house. That’s when I first saw it, Everett.”
“Saw what?”
“This… this vulnerability,” I said. “It’s something Reese is really good at hiding – it’s almost a blink-and-you-miss-it thing – but that day with the girl, it was there. I saw it in how he handled the father too – the guy was a fucking mess about his kid, but Reese got him calmed down. He wasn’t ready to call the guy innocent, but he told him they’d figure it out and no matter what, his little girl was safe.” I shook my head and smiled.
“What?” Everett asked.
“When Reese was explaining to the guy that we were going to figure out the truth, he was talking to the guy like they were buddies. But right before he left the room, he told the guy if it turned out he’d hurt his kid, Reese would…” I dropped my words off as I realized I’d been about to repeat the exact threat Reese had made that day.
Not exactly something a father needed to hear about his son.
“Well, it wouldn’t be pretty,” I said lamely. “Anyway, Reese’s instincts were spot-on. We found proof that the girl had been abusedafterthe guy had divorced his wife. He hadn’t been allowed to see the girl in that time. The little girl eventually admitted it was her mother’s new husband. The fucker went to jail, the mom was brought up on obstruction charges and the dad got to take his little girl back home to Minnesota. And Reese, he went back to being a walled-off asshole.”
I paused and said, “He’s not the same kid you remember, Everett, but I think parts of him are still in there. I think he’s craving things that he’s afraid to need again.”
“Like what?”
“Stability… needing to be needed… family.”
Everett nodded. “He should have all that and more.”
“I don’t know what happened to him while he was doing whatever mercenary work got him into trouble, but it definitely left its mark on him. That shit isn’t from his childhood,” I offered.
“Maybe not. But if I’d been a better father, he wouldn’t have gone looking for whatever those guys were offering.”
I began to protest, but Everett pressed his thumb against my lips. “Let’s say it like it is,” he said softly. He let his thumb slide down my chin, then my throat. “There was this photographer a few years back who did this coffee table book depicting my years in office. He sent me a copy when it was done. It took me a long time to open it up because I didn’t want to see those pictures of myself and knowthe truth behind all the fake smiles. But when I did finally look, the very first picture I saw was of Reese.”
Everett suddenly pulled his hand back and covered his eyes with it. “I didn’t even recognize my own boy,” he said, his voice strangled. He managed to muffle his sob, presumably so he wouldn’t wake Nash. I reached out and settled my hand on his cheek, but I let him have the moment.
As much as I wanted to, I knew there were things I just couldn’t protect him from.
When he calmed down, he wiped at his face and dropped his hand. “Picture after picture,” he murmured. “He looked so… lost. There was no light in his eyes and in the few pictures where he smiled, it wasn’t his smile. It was mine. That fake fucking smile I’d spent a lifetime perfecting. I knew he was struggling with the adjustment of living in the public eye when I’d first taken office, but I just… I completely missed how bad it really was. He wasn’t just struggling, he was… he was…” Everett struggled to get the words out as emotion clogged his throat.
“He was executing the fucking plan,” he croaked.
Everett began to cry, so I pulled him into my arms, not caring that the move would wake Nash.
It did.
Nash went on high alert within seconds. He opened his mouth, probably to ask me what was wrong, but when I shook my head, he remained silent. He scooted up against Everett’s back and settled his arm over his waist. I had my lips pressed to the top of Everett’s head and Nash’s were by his ear. Between us, we whispered nonsensical words to him and we held him, but we didn’t try to stop his tears.
Because we both knew they’d been a long time coming.
Everett eventually quieted, then fell asleep. Nash and I continued to hold him as we just watched one another for a while. The hand Nash had over Everett’s belly would randomly stroke over mine too. And while his touch would always turn me on, I knew that wasn’t why he was doing it. It was his way of keeping us all connected.
We lay there like that for a long time before I was forced torelease Everett and carefully turned him toward Nash. The older man instinctively curled against Nash’s chest and Nash wrapped his arms around him. As much as I hated to leave them, I needed to tuck my daughter in. With the tension in the house as high as it was, Charlie needed every bit of normalcy she could get. I also didn’t want to risk Reese getting suspicious about where I was. I leaned across the bed and kissed Nash, but neither of us said anything.
