“You had no choice,” I said. “He would have killed you.”
“Yes, he would have,” Jace agreed.
“I’m sorry, Jace. You shouldn’t have been put in that position, but I’m glad you’re still here.”
Jace’s lips pressed against the top of my head. It was another move I was becoming far too dependent on.
“Me too,” he murmured.
We fell silent for a while as I tried to work up the courage to be even half as brave as he’d been in telling me his story. Shame curled through me as I sucked in the oxygen I would need to say the words that I’d never spoken to another living soul.
“My father let Richard Jennings have sex with me.”
Chapter 11
Jace
I’d triedto prepare myself for whatever Caleb had to tell me, but truthfully, I hadn’t been ready for the admission.
I wasn’t sure there was any way to be ready to hear something like that.
I found myself holding him tighter and dropping my face to the back of his neck as I squeezed my eyes shut. I managed to quell the sob that was bubbling up from my throat.
Caleb had said “have sex with” but I knew what that really meant.
“It happened on a camping trip. It was me, my dad, Mr. Jennings, and this guy who worked with my dad. He called him Rush, but I’m not sure if that was his real name or not.”
“How old were you?” I asked.
Caleb hesitated, then answered, “Fifteen.” He paused for a moment, then said, “They were drinking and playing poker… they kept getting louder and louder, so I stayed in my tent and read.” His voice cracked when he whispered, “Harry Potter.”
“Oh God, Caleb, I’m sorry,” I bit out. I wanted to tell him he didn’t have to continue, but I also wanted him to get it out… to lance that wound so that it would…
It would what?
Heal?
Was that even possible? Could someone ever truly heal from that kind of brutality? Maybe I was making things worse by making him relive it. Before I could even consider that, Caleb continued on his own.
“My dad called for me. They were sitting around the campfire. It was this spot we used to go to all the time. Most of the time, Nick would come with, but by then he’d started to use more so he wasn’t around as much. My dad had me sit down next to him on this log and he put his hand on my thigh. I couldn’t believe he was doing it – I was afraid Mr. Jennings and Rush would figure out our secret. He started telling me how Rush really liked me and told me to go sit next to him. Rush was… he was a really big guy. He made me uncomfortable because he’d been looking at me weird all weekend. I told my dad I didn’t want to sit by Rush, but he got upset and told me to do it.”
My stomach dropped out because I knew what was coming.
“I did what he said. Rush started touching me and saying how pretty I was. He made me put my hand on his… his groin. I looked at my dad…”
Caleb’s voice broke and he sucked in a harsh sob. “I actually thought he’d stop it. When Rush forced me to my knees in front of him, I called out for my dad. He… he told me to show Rush how good I sucked cock.”
Caleb began sucking in deep breaths of air. I turned him around so he was facing me and pulled him up against my chest. “You’re safe, Caleb. They can’t hurt you anymore. I’ll never let anyone hurt you ever again, do you hear me?” My words were harsh, but I couldn’t help it. Tears blurred my vision. I felt Caleb nod against my chest.
“I thought it would just be the blow job, but then Rush made me get on my hands and knees. I thought my dad would stop it… it was… it was our thing. He used to say that to me – that it was our special secret and no one could ever know because they wouldn’t understand just how much he loved me. But when he let Rush do that to me…”
Caleb shook his head. “I cried the whole time. When Rush was finished, he just left me lying there in the dirt. I heard him and my dad talking about how Rush knew my dad was bluffing. I… I didn’t get it at first.” Caleb choked back a sob and whispered, “He lost me in a bet.”
“What?” I asked, because I was certain I’d heard him wrong.
“My dad ran out of money while they were playing poker so he bet me. And lost.”
“Fucking son of a bitch!” I snarled. I slammed my fist into the headboard. The wood held and pain radiated throughout my hand and arm. But it wasn’t enough.
