Sienna saw herself, like an out-of-body experience. Or worse, a highlight reel from her Instagram feed she didn’t remember filming. Sienna walking to her bed, listening for footsteps, thrilled when she heard Vivian follow and the door click shut behind her. Sienna dropping her dress to the floor when Vivian’s back was turned. The surprise on Vivian’s face when Sienna, completely naked, lunged for her and crashed her mouth against the host’s.
“Fuck!” Sienna screamed into her pillow. “I tried to climb her like a jungle gym.”
She sat up so fast the tent spun around her like she was on a merry-go-round. She could still feel Vivian, the press of her palm against Sienna’s bare skin. And then, like salt in her already painful wound, she remembered how Vivian had pulled back, and had looked every bit as regretful as Sienna should have felt if only she’d been in her right mind.
“What the hell did I—”
Her words were cut off by a knock on the door.
Sienna froze. Completely. Even her heartbeat seemed to stop. For one horrifying second, she imagined Elise standing on the other side of the door, arms crossed, expression somewhere between disgust and amusement, ready to tell her she’d been officially fired. If that was even possible. CouldThe Sapphic Matchfire their star? Maybe. Probably. It wasn’t like they were very far into the show. They could fly out another bachelorette tomorrow.
“It’s Charles,” the voice said instead. “Elise asked me to let you know about today’s itinerary.”
Itinerary. Shit.
Sienna swung her legs off the bed and winced. Her head throbbed. Her skull felt like it had become a drum that someone was testing for sound quality. She found her robe behind the bathroom door, threw it over her naked body, and then it hit her. Vivian had walked her to her bed last night. She’d pulled back the covers. Guided Sienna in gently, like she was tucking in a very drunk teenager instead of a fully grown adult who’d just tried to seduce her. She’d said something. What was it? Something soft. Something devastatingly kind. And then she’d left.
Sienna pressed a hand over her eyes. Not only did she not want to see her own reflection in the mirror, but she also didn’t deserve to see at all. Not after what she had done. Eyes were for people who didn’t behave like complete and total idiots.
There was another knock. “Everything okay in there?” Charles called.
“I’m coming!” Sienna yelled, her voice cracking like a preteen boy’s. She pulled her robe tighter and headed for the door, which she threw open.
A young PA stood outside on the wooden pathway, smiling. He had deep shadows under his eyes and ruffled sandy-blonde hair. But when he said “morning,” it came out bright and sprightly, not at all exhausted like she’d expected. Looking at him, Sienna couldn’t help thinking about how he hadn’t just ruined his entire life by trying to sleep with the host ofThe Sapphic Match.
Lucky him.
“The next date starts in an hour,” Charles said. “You’ll be heading out after breakfast for a bush picnic date by the watering hole.”
Sienna blinked against the bright sun. “Bush picnic?”
“By a watering hole,” he said. “It’s apparently very rustic. They’ve set up a canopy under the acacias. There’s a good chance you’ll see elephants bathing.” He looked almost jealous, and for a moment Sienna wanted to convince him to dress in her clothing and take her place. She needed a minute. Hell, she needed a few days, or years even until Vivian had completely forgotten all about last night. If that was even possible. Which it probably wasn’t.
“Okay,” she managed to say. “I’ll be ready.”
“Are you sure?” he asked. “Because I can get Fiona to come in if you need.” He gestured vaguely toward his own cheek. Sienna realized he meant that she probably looked like a horrible mess that needed help.
“I’m sure.” Then she slammed the door closed and headed for the shower. At least there her tears would blend in with the water running down her face.
An hour later, Sienna walked along the winding pathway toward the main lodge deck where she was set to meet the contestants joining her for today’s date. The sun was already punishingly bright, stabbing rudely at her retinas. The air smelled like wet earth and acacia sap, which made her stomach twist with nausea. And somewhere in the distance a bird hooted, announcing her arrival.
Sienna spotted Lara first. She was tall, with a blonde braid slung over one shoulder. She wore a khaki romper and white Adidas Samba sneakers. She looked like a new-age Brooke Shields minus the Blue Lagoon tan.
“Morning, Sienna,” Lara said brightly, raising a stainless steel water bottle with the lodge’s logo branded into the side. “We were just saying how insane this view is.”
Marie stepped out from behind her. She was smaller and darker, with freckles on her nose and a floppy, dusty orange sunhat that matched perfectly with her linen overalls.
“There’s literally a giraffe over there,” she said, pointing toward the bushveld that Sienna had ignored on her entire walk up there. She’d been too busy hoping not to bump into Vivian.
“Oh really,” Sienna said, forcing a smile for the two cameras angled in her direction. She followed Marie’s pointed finger, and sure enough, there was a giraffe. It was standing halfway between a marula tree and a large termite mound. Its eyelids drooped lazily, and its spotted coat glowed honey-gold in the early light. Its tail flicked invisible flies. “He’s gorgeous,” she added, putting on her most polished voice. “We really are lucky to be here, aren’t we?”
Both Marie and Lara agreed.
Elise appeared out of nowhere. She strode across the deck, holding an iPad that she checked twice before she acknowledged them. “Okay, ladies,” she said. “You’ll be heading out for a picnic this morning at the watering hole. It’s one of thelodge’s more famous ones, but your guide will tell you all about that on your way there.”
She met Sienna’s eyes for just a second too long, and Sienna found herself wondering if Elise knew. Had Vivian told her all about last night in excruciating detail? Or was it just her own guilt manifesting and bubbling under her skin?
“Vivian was going to join us for the first segment,” Elise went on. “But she seems to have come down with a headache, so you’ll be heading out without her.”
