I jolt awake with a gasp, my body jerking against the restraints. Pain explodes through my wrists where the silver hasbeen burning for hours. I’m covered in sweat. My breathing is shallow and ragged, my heart pounding as if I’ve been running for my life.
Just a dream. It was just a dream.
Except it wasn’t. Not really.
That conversation happened. That torture happened. Hundreds of variations of it over ten years, wearing me down bit by bit until I believed their lies.
Until I became what they wanted me to be.
I hang here limply, trying to get my breathing under control. The dungeon is dark except for a sliver of light coming from a tiny window high above. My body aches everywhere—from the silver, from the poison, from the beatings during the interrogations.
But worse than the physical pain is the weight of what I know now: I was lied to.
The cell door opens, but I don’t have the energy to lift my head. Footsteps approach. Measured. Controlled.
“Your burner phone received a call,” Darius says.
I force myself to look up. He’s standing a few feet away, arms crossed, staring at me.
“We didn’t answer it, of course,” he continues. “But they’ll know something’s wrong when you don’t respond. How long before they realize you’ve been compromised?”
“Not long.” My voice comes out hoarse. “Maybe a day. Two at most. They’ll assume I’ve either been captured or killed.”
“And then?”
“They’ll cut their losses. Pull out of the area. Disappear.” I meet his eyes. “Or they’ll come back with a plan B.”
Darius’s gaze is cold. “If that happens, you will have outlived your usefulness to me.”
I hang my head, knowing exactly what he means.
“There’s still time,” he says. “If you cooperate.”
This is it.
If I say nothing, I’ll either die from the poison in two weeks or be executed by Darius. And the organization may or may not disappear into the shadows.
But if I help Darius, Anne will finally be out of this mess.
The image of her face flashes through my mind. I remember the way she smiled and laughed when I caught that tiny fish at the creek. The way she kissed me like I was everything.
Did I ever really love her? Or was it just the mate bond?
No, that’s not it. I loved her before I left for the war. Before they took me. We loved each other as teenagers planning our future together. And when I came back and saw her again, despite the conditioning I’d been subjected to…I loved her then, too.
The mission was real. The lies were real. And what I felt for her? That was as real as anything could be.
I relished each moment, watching her work, seeing her kindness toward everyone around her even when she was hurting inside.
I fell in love with her twice. Once as a boy who didn’t know what the world would take from him, and again as a broken man who didn’t deserve her but couldn’t help wanting her anyway.
She needs to know that. Even if she hates me. Even if she never wants to see me again. Even if she will never forgive me, she deserves to know that part was real.
“If you let Anne go, I’ll help you,” I hear myself say, hoping I broke through enough of the conditioning the other day to survive this. “Whatever you need to take down the organization, to protect Violet, I’ll help.”
“Is that so?” Darius asks dryly. “So, you’ll turn on the Covenant just like you turned on your pack?”
I slump against the chains weakly. “There’s a reason why I couldn’t simply walk away from them.”
