“It’s not that simple,” she said quietly. “I won’t ever get over this, Quinn. This isn’t a passing infatuation.”
“Is there anything I can do?” His voice reflected helplessness.
“You’ve already done a lot. Thank you for lending me an understanding ear.”
He kissed the top of her head. “Now what’s this about you breaking your engagement? Is it too late to recant?”
She drew away and wiped away her tears. “No. I won’t. No matter what, I can’t marry Stuart. I’d rather spend my life alone than settle for a lifetime of unhappiness with him.”
He blew out his breath and massaged his chin with his hand. “Papa isn’t going to like this. Even if he never finds out about your indiscretions.”
She looked away. “I realize this. But I can’t sacrifice my happiness for some expectation he has. I just can’t. I know it is a terrible flaw that I can’t be more dutiful, but I feel as if I’m being punished for something I haven’t even done. Being sent away from my family to marry someone I loathe.”
“I don’t blame you,” he said softly. “And I want you to know that you have my support. I won’t leave you to face Papa alone.”
“Oh, Quinn. You are such a dear, dear brother.” She threw herself into his arms and hugged him tightly.
He returned her embrace then pulled slowly away. “I’ll leave you alone now. But if you have need of me, I am never far away.”
She smiled half-heartedly and watched as he withdrew from her room. Leaning back on her bed, she turned over and faced the window, the setting sun bathing her bed in its soft glow.
What would she do now? Her engagement was ended as was any chance she had of a life with Gray. But what remained was the threat against her. She could not ignore all that had transpired in the last week. Nor that someone had broken into her bedroom to retrieve the locket and the box containing the letters. What would happen when it was discovered the letters were missing? And now that she had broken her engagement, Stuart would have even more reason to be suspicious of her.
For a fleeting moment, she considered going to the viscount with all she knew. Surely he would want justice for his wife’s murder, even if it meant finding out his son was responsible. But by doing so, she would make herself even more of a target. She doubted Stuart knew with any certainty that she was convinced he was a murderer. But if she went to his father she would remove any doubt. And there was the chance that the viscount would want to avoid the inevitable scandal such a disclosure would involve.
A single tear trailed out the corner of her eye, wetting the pillow. Then another. As the day faded to night, so did her hopes. No matter what she chose to do, she wouldn’t have what she most wanted. She’d have her freedom, but the price she’d pay was more than she ever dreamed it would be.
She’d spend the rest of her life in agony over the love she lost.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Jenna sipped at the warm cup of chocolate then glanced back over the letters in her hand. Her anger told her to just hold the papers to the candle in front of her and forget the whole sordid affair. But common sense directed her to hold onto the only proof she had. No matter the selfish motives that prompted her affair, she was a person solidly rooted in what was right and wrong. And allowing Stuart to get away with murdering his mother was wrong.
She leaned back in her father’s large chair, leaving the letters lying on his desk. She could hire a Bow Street runner to handle the investigation, or she could simply hand over the letters to the viscount and trust him to do the right thing. She would have to offer a detailed explanation to Mamma and Papa when they returned, and she was sure, though their disappointment would be great, that they would understand and forgive her.
Though her heart ached with grief over Gray’s rejection, she felt at peace over her decision to take her future into her own hands.
Her contemplation was interrupted when Thomas cleared his throat from the doorway of her father’s office. “My lady, Viscount Dudley is here to see you.”
Her head came up in surprise as she digested this most unexpected news. Glancing down at the letters and then back up at Thomas, she managed to stammer out, “Tell the viscount, I will receive him shortly. And Thomas, see that we are not disturbed.”
Thomas nodded and retreated from the study.
She stuffed the letters into her father’s desk and hurried for the door. She would see the purpose in his visit before deciding what to do about her new-found knowledge.
Not bothering to check her appearance, she walked gracefully into the drawing room where the viscount waited. To her relief, he was alone. Disregarding any notion of propriety, she shut the door behind her. She then turned to face the viscount, who had risen upon her entrance.
“My lord,” she said, executing a polite curtsy.
“Lady Jenna,” he returned with a perfunctory nod of his head.
“May I offer you refreshment?”
“No need, my lady. I am sure you know well the purpose of my visit. I see no need to bandy words, so I’ll get directly to my point.”
“Your directness is appreciated, my lord,” Jenna said as she came to a stop by the window. She refused to sit and offer him the advantage, so she stood, staring unblinkingly at him.
“Stuart has informed me that you’ve been to see him and have broken off the engagement.”
