Any time a marriage lost both an emotionalanda physical connection it was no longer about a kink they both enjoyed. It had become a matter of survival. The survival of their love and their marriage.
As soon as the waiter delivered their entrees and they were afforded complete privacy, Chessy asked the question she was sure was also burning a hole in Joss’s brain. Chessy reached for Kylie’s hand and squeezed.
“How did your first counseling session with Jensen go?”
Kylie’s expression became shuttered and she briefly glanced away. Then, as if realizing that Joss and Chessy were her best friends and confidantes, she looked back up, vulnerability shining in her eyes.
Chessy tightened her hold on Kylie’s hand while Joss reached for Kylie’s other.
“You don’t have to tell us,” Joss said in a low voice. “The last thing we want is for you to be uncomfortable. We were both worried and we knew since it was only the first time that things may not have gone as well as you’d like. So say as much or as little as you’re okay with. Chessy and I love you. You’re our sister in our hearts. We just want you to know that you can always talk to us about anything and we’d never betray your confidence. Even to Dash or Tate.”
As Joss spoke, she glanced Chessy’s way as if gauging whether she was speaking for the both of them and if Chessy was in agreement with all Joss had to say.
Chessy nodded immediately. “Absolutely. We just want you to know we love you and we worry about you. You and Joss are my best friends in the world, and God knows you’ve both nursed me through my frequent misery and bouts of self-pity.”
Kylie gave them a watery smile, which prompted Joss to shove a table napkin into the hand Joss had only just let go. It was a well-known fact in the group that Kylie hated crying. Especially in public. It would mortify her if she knew someone saw her losing control in a room full of people.
Kylie accepted the napkin and wiped hastily at her face. “At least I didn’t wear makeup today,” she said ruefully.
“You’re too beautiful to need makeup,” Joss said firmly.
Chessy smiled her agreement.
Kylie laughed, her tears replaced by mirth. “You’re both so full of shit but I love you for it.” Then her expression sobered once more and she breathed out a sigh. “The therapy session went okay. I mean I guess as well as it could go considering that for me it was akin to bloodletting. The therapist wants to see us individually first before she sees us together. Monday is Jensen’s turn and then I suppose the therapist will compare notes on our insanity and try to put the puzzle pieces together or try to figure out how two equally fucked-up people ever belong in a relationship together.”
Chessy scowled. “That better be sarcasm or your twisted sense of humor coming out because you and Jensen are perfect for one another.”
Kylie smiled. “I may have inserted alittlesarcasm.”
Joss snorted. “Ya think? Come on. Give us the real scoop. Unless of course it’s too personal and you’d rather not get into it.”
Kylie rolled her eyes and shook her head. “I think we’ve established that I seem to have no personal boundaries when it comes to the two of you. Just recently, as I recall, we were shitfaced drunk in Joss’s living room and I was blurting out what a stupid-head Jensen was and then I revealed my grand seduction plan of making love to him andthentying him to the bed. If I survived telling you guys all of that I think a visit to my therapist pales in comparison.”
Chessy and Joss both dissolved into laughter.
“She does have a point,” Chessy admitted. “Even Dash was privy to that particular outburst. But it was a brilliant plan. I have to give you that.”
Kylie groaned and briefly covered her face with her hands. “Did you have to remind me that Dash was there to witness my drunken humiliation?”
“Hey, it worked, did it not?” Joss demanded. “I’d say you pulled that plan off spectacularly.”
A satisfied smile curved Kylie’s lips upward, effectively erasing all the earlier conflicting emotions that had shone in her eyes.
“Yeah, it worked,” Kylie said in a faraway tone that told both the other women she was taking an X-rated trip down memory lane.
Then she shook her head as if coming down from the clouds, her expression growing somber once more.
“We discussed my childhood and my inability—or rather my inability until I met Jensen—to form relationships with men. And the fact that in particular I feared dominant, strong men. She made me feel …normal.”
The last was said in a bewildered tone as if Kylie had never until now considered herself remotely normal.
“Sweetie, of course you’re normal,” Chessy defended. “After what you endured at your father’s hands I’d say youwouldn’tbe normal if that didn’t affect you well into your adult life. Think about it. The one man in a little girl’s life she’s supposed to be able to trust above all others, the one who is supposed to protect her at all costs, betrayed you horribly. He abused you horribly. No woman—I don’t care if she’s Super Woman—could escape that kind of horror unscathed.”
“Besides, you’ve merely been discerning when it comes to men,” Joss said with conviction. “That doesn’t make you abnormal. That makes you picky, and all women should be picky when it comes to choosing the man they’ll trust and give their hearts to. Can you imagine your life without Jensen now? What if you’d hooked up with some other guy? You wouldn’t have what you have now, so fuck normal.”
Chessy’s and Kylie’s mouths both dropped open in unison. Then Chessy burst into laughter until tears streaked down her cheeks. She coughed and wheezed into her napkin while Joss gave them both looks of bewilderment.
“Well, that’s one way to put it,” Kylie said ruefully. “And it mirrors what Jensen himself has said. I believe his exact words were ‘fuck normal.’”
