Then he closed his eyes as if praying for deliverance. “I’ll make you a deal,” he said, wincing as he spoke. “I’ll run down to the hotel gift shop and see about getting you some sweats and a decent shirt if you swear never to tell Silas I had to help you get dressed. I like my face just like it is.”
Hayley pursed her lips and glared in his direction. “Wuss. Whatever. Just hurry up before I fall asleep.”
39
Hayley waved over her shoulder as she stepped off the elevator on Silas’s floor, leaving Thane to ride back down. He’d wanted to walk her to Silas’s door, but she’d refused. She wasn’t leaving without one hell of a fight and she’d rather not air it all out in front of witnesses.
Squaring her jaw, she marched up to Silas’s door and knocked sharply. She winced when she heard a thud, followed by the sound of breaking glass and muffled cursing. Then there was silence. She lifted her hand and knocked more loudly. If she had to stand here knocking all night she’d do it.
Finally she heard the sound of Silas fumbling with the locks, and she held her breath until finally the door opened wide and Silas stood before her, blinking fuzzily. She wrinkled her nose when she caught a whiff of the alcohol that seemed to encompass him.
His face scrunched up in confusion as his bleary-eyed gaze swept over her.
“Princess?” His voice was barely audible as he stared at her in bewilderment. “You’re here.”
She put both hands on her hips and glared at him. “Oh, that’s just great. I came over here to tell you exactly what I think of your noblegesture and how self-sacrificing you are and you’re so drunk you won’t even remember me giving you a piece of my mind in the morning.”
He looked so sad that it was all she could do to stand firm and not wrap her arms around him and hold him close. Then she glanced down to see shards of glass glittering on the floor all around him.
“Silas, you have to be careful. You’re barefooted and there’s broken glass everywhere. Let’s go inside before you fall over.”
He followed her like a lost puppy and when she saw blood smudges on the floor she realized he hadn’t missed all the pieces. Placing a cautious hand on his chest, she eased him around and led him to his couch. His eyes never left her.
“Prop your feet up on the table. I’m going to grab the first-aid kit.”
She was almost to the bathroom when his whispered, “Miss you,” reached her.
After grabbing the kit, she sat on the coffee table and began pulling the tiny slivers from his still-bleeding feet. Once again, his gaze followed her every move. He was treating her as if she were an apparition, afraid if he looked away she might vanish. “Miss you so much,” he whispered again. “All day, all night. All I do is miss you.”
Tears stung her eyes as she blinked to keep them from falling. He was breaking her already-broken heart. She cleared her throat. “I can yell at you later, honey. Let me clean up your feet.” She uncapped the antiseptic. “This is going to hurt. I’m sorry,” she said quietly.
He never flinched as she dabbed the liquid to his cuts.
“Hurts all the time. Didn’t used to. Felt nothing and that wasn’t a bad thing. Then you came along. Felt peace. Felt fuckin’ happy for the first time in my life. Then I fucked it up. Now it hurts. Should, though. I deserve it. Didn’t deserve you. Never did. Knew that but I took you anyway. And brought you into hell with me.”
Hayley lost her battle with the tears as she wrapped his feet in gauze. God, so much pain in his voice. He didn’t know what he wassaying and would likely hate himself in the morning if he remembered baring his soul this way. She’d been prepared to yell at him. To stomp around and make her point and then tell him what she thought about him tossing her out for her own good.
She went to the bedroom, grabbed a pillow and brought it back to the couch. “Can you lie down for me, Silas? I need to clean up the broken glass.”
He reclined back onto the pillow, reaching up to trail his fingers down her damp cheek. “Don’t cry, my Hayley. You have to know I’d do anything for you.” He slowly lowered his hand back to his chest, his gaze still locked on her face.
She looked away, no longer able to meet his eyes without succumbing to the temptation to curl into his arms, where she’d finally feel warm and safe again. But she wouldn’t take advantage of him. He might not want her when he sobered up. Not after she’d told him to fuck off, not once, but twice.
By the time she finished sweeping up all the glass, all she heard from Silas’s direction was his light snore. She tossed the glass in the garbage and then picked up one of the comforters and gently covered his unconscious form. Then it was she who trailed fingers down his bristly cheek.
“What am I going to do about you, Silas?” she whispered. “We’re both so miserable. Are we going to keep pushing one another away until it’s too late?”
***
The light shining against his lids caused jackhammers to start up in Silas’s head. With a groan, he tried to roll over and almost fell off his... couch? Cracking open one eye, he confirmed that yes, he was on his couch. And yes, he had killed the fifth of whiskey in his cabinet. And a second one. He’d been working on his third when the doorbell rang and...
Ignoring the pounding in his head, he bolted upright. Hayley hadbeen there. He looked to the right and discovered Hayley wasstillthere. Curled up on the opposite couch with his comforter wrapped around her, raven hair spread across his pillow. His pulse ratcheted up about a hundred more beats per minute. Jesus, but she took his breath away.
Moving as quietly as possible, he eased to his feet and had to bite back a hiss.Fuck.Half the bottle he broke in his rush to get the door open the night before must have been stuck in his feet. When Hayley should have been home resting and tending to her own injuries, she’d beenheretaking care of his stupid, drunken ass. He wished he could be one of those drunks who had complete amnesia of the previous night, but he had perfect recall. He clearly remembered the tears streaming down her face as she wrapped his feet. He really was the lowest motherfucker to ever walk the planet.
He went to the kitchen and started the coffee, downing some ibuprofen dry. He’d let her sleep as long as she wanted, and then when she was up he’d fix her breakfast and find out why she had come over when she’d made it clear she never wanted to see him again. He frowned. She’d said something about wanting to yell at him. If the pounding in his head ever eased he might be able to figure it out for himself, but he doubted it. Her words and the resolve on her face at their last meeting had made it clear there was nothing he could offer that she would want.
The coffee had just finished brewing when he heard Hayley start to stir. He fixed her a cup just the way she liked it and brought it to her. As she sat up, a grimace crossed her face and her breath hitched.
