The Gi came with a white belt and I stood on the far left of the line of women with the beginners, where I’d stood when I’d first joined. It gave me a sense of déjà vu. With each belt I’d earned, I’d moved up the line. Sensei Daniel was a tall man with a craggy face. He was nearing sixty, but looked younger than his age. He was tough as nails. He could have been intimidating, but was soft-spoken and kind.
I recognized several women from 2019 when I’d joined before. They’d been my level or higher, but tonight they wore belts of different colors than I was accustomed to seeing them wear.
I was jittery about the class, but everything seemed the same as it was in 2022. My classmates were polite and respected my wish for space. I kept to myself. We bowed in and did the basics. The ritual was familiar, and I soon lost myself to the movements, which gave me a sense of peace. It was easy to leave the rest of my life outside the dojo.
After class, I stayed and ran through all my kata, starting with the beginner patterns and moving up to the ones I’d learned in the last several months. I made my movements crisp and sure. The only thing I lacked was the announcements at the beginning. I borrowed weapons: bo, nunchaku, and sais to demonstrate my abilities. Sensei raised his eyebrows at the sound of my ki-yi’s. Though I couldn’t speak, I could yell in my kata. At the end of our time, he bowed, welcomed me to his dojo, and shook my hand.
“You must not have had much time off,” he said. “You said you’re a blue belt, but I’m promoting you. You’ve shown brown belt level.”
I bowed my thanks. My eyes sparkled with happy tears, but I blinked them back. The dojo was not a place to cry, but I was warm inside, proud of my accomplishment.
I strode through the warm evening on my way home. Summer approached with longer daylight hours. When I arrived home, it was six and Christopher was due any second. He’d have to wait. I needed a shower, so I sent him a quick message.
“Late getting home. Need fifteen minutes.”
He sent back,“LOL. I knew it. Picking up food in fifteen. Hope you like sushi.”
I loved sushi.
I set my gear on the table, fed Ember, and jumped in the shower. I’d just dressed when I heard a knock. Good timing. I threw the door open and Christopher entered, carrying two large bags of food. He’d brought enough for four people.
“How’d you know I’d be late?”I was unsure if I was grateful or offended.
“I’ve known you for years. You’re late to every meeting, every dinner, every date you’ve ever been on with my brother. Trust me, I’ve heard about it in excruciating detail. I counted on you being late.” He set the food on the table and picked up my new brown belt. “Crisp and new,” he said. “Congrats.”
My irritation at his comments flew out the window, and I flushed, happy he’d noticed. I enjoyed sharing my news. It was less solitary. Grabbing my jacket, Gi, and the items from the table, I took them into my bedroom to hang up later. I’d moved back into the guest room. I hadn’t been able to sleep in the Master bedroom. There were too many terrible memories associated with that space.
“Plates?” he said as I returned to the kitchen. “You must be starving, too.”
I grabbed plates and chopsticks and set them on the table while he unpacked the containers of food. It was hard not to stare. There must have been over a hundred and fifty dollars’ worth of sushi. Regular rolls, fancy rolls with sauces, tuna and salmon sashimi, edamame, sunomono, tempura, all my favorites.
“I didn’t know what you liked, so I got things I like. Looks like you approve.”
I nodded.
“What’s my share?”He’d paid for the Mexican the other night when I was in the washroom. It wasn’t fair to make him pay this time, too.
“You’re supplying free dinner on Friday.”
“That’s my sister. Not me.”
“I’m giving you credit. Take it.”
I didn’t want to talk about Friday and I was hungry, so I let the subject drop. We loaded up our plates and started eating.
“I don’t think I’ve met your sister before, have I?”
I shook my head. My hands were too busy to type when I was eating.
“On the phone, she sure talked fast. Asked a lot of questions.”
I shrugged. Meghan and I were just different. She always had lots to say, and I didn’t.
“You like her fiancé?” He speared another piece of sashimi and dipped it in soy before popping it in his mouth.
I nodded.
I typed before grabbing another California roll.“Andrew.”
