Standing ten feet back, the image is pristine. The lines are straight, crisp, and beautiful. But as I get closer, I see the imperfections. I see the mistakes, the errors, spots where he couldn’t quite get it right.
But it doesn’t matter. Because nothing is ever perfect. If I look at the whole picture, it’s breathtaking. I don’t care about the jagged lines, the accidental blotches of mismatched paint, the fact that the zebra’s eyes are two different sizes. None of that matters. The mistakes don’t ruin the mural. The mistakes are what make it unique. Special.
If only he could see that. If only he could’ve stepped back and seen what was before him. A future. Not perfect. But breathtaking.
I sigh, giving our broken future one last glance.
If only.
Picking up an empty moving box, I start toward the bedroom. As much as I want to incinerate every inch of this house, I can’t. I can’t leave behind the evidence of his hope, evidence that he once saw a glimmer of what could have been.
“Are you sure you want to do this now?” Quinappears at the threshold of our bedroom. He leans against the doorframe, a melancholy smile gracing his features as his gaze floats across the various boxes on the floor. “This can wait, darling. Maybe when we come back, we can?—”
“No.” I drop to my knees, opening another one of Damon’s drawers. Hesitation clenches my muscles as I stare down at his clothes. “I can’t keep living like this. He’s everywhere, Quin. And he’s not coming back. What’s the point of keeping all his things? It’s just taking up space.”
Quin tentatively joins me on the rug. Memories flood my mind. This room was once a haven, a safe space full of love and devotion. It was where we slept. Where we felt comfort and security. Now it’s tainted. Ruined by shattered dreams and selfishness.
“What did she look like?” I ask, my heart fracturing as I place a pair of his socks into the cardboard box. “The woman you saw. I-I wonder if it’s the same one?—”
“Emery, please.” Quin rests his hand on mine, so gentle and concerned.
I refuse to look up at him. I refuse to let him see the agony in my eyes.
“I need to know, Quin. I need to know if it’s the same woman.” My voice breaks, and I can feel the tears threatening to spill over.
Quin’s grip tightens on my hand, his thumb gently stroking my skin. “She had dark curly hair, about shoulder length. She…” His jaw clenches. “Emery, please. It-It doesn’t matter. It won’t help.”
I nod, swallowing hard. “I know. I just... I can’t help but wonder.”
We sit there in silence for a moment longer before Quin speaks again. “Why don’t you let me finish this? You should take a break. Rest a little, darling. The car will be here in a few hours to take us to the airport.”
I shake my head, the stubbornness in me refusing to back down. “No, I need to do this. I need to get rid of his things, Quin. It’s the only way I can move on.”
Quin sighs, his hand lingering on my shoulder for a moment before he stands. “Alright, but let me help.”
We continue packing in silence, each of us lost in our own thoughts. As I place Damon’s belongings into the boxes, a numbness starts to settle over me.
I pick up one of Damon’s favorite sweaters, the one he always wore on lazy Sunday mornings. I remember how he used to wrap me in it, how his warmth and scent enveloped me. My hands tremble as I fold it neatly and place it in the box. Tears blur my vision, but I blink them away, determined to see this through.
After what feels like an eternity, the boxes are filled, and the room looks emptier, less like a home and more like a shell. I take a deep breath, trying to steady myself.
“I’m going to get his brushes. I think I left them in the…”
He nods, understanding. “I’ll be here.”
When I reach the nursery, I pause, my heart aching as I step inside. How is it possible to love and hate something with the same degree of passion? I hate this fucking room. I hate it.
But God…
A vision overwhelms me as I stand surrounded by the remnants of a future that will never come.
The room transforms before me, filling with light and warmth. Damon stands in the center of the room, cradling our baby in his arms, his face lit up with pure unadulterated joy. It’s a sight that takes my breath away.
Damon’s eyes meet mine, sparkling with pride. He’s beaming, his smile wide and genuine. The baby coos softly, snuggling against Damon’s chest. The love is palpable, so strong that it fills every corner of by body. So strong that it wraps around my broken heart.
Beside him, Quin shakes a rattle toy, grinning. The baby giggles. Such a sweet, melodic sound. Quin laughs. Light and airy. Happy. We’re all so damn happy.
I step closer into the room, my heart swelling as I look down at my two men and the baby boy we’ve created together.
