Was it all a lie? How long did she know?
I didn’t answer Chino because I don’t know what to say. The truth is, I won’t stop looking, but I also don’t expect him to continue to follow me around. I look up at my friend, placing the blue can in the air and cheering. “You saved me, and I will forever be thankful, but this isn’t your demon to chase; it’s mine. Chino, go home.”
“Nah.” He shakes his head. “This ain’t what I was talking about. Like, man, you can’t continue to chase after Tokyo.”
“She’s not my sister,” I finally say, admitting to her betrayal out loud, because that’s what that was back at Heartless. There’s no doubt about that. But I know, deep down, there’s more to it. I refuse to believe Tokyo is just a selfish bitch, like I’m sure he’s thinking right now.
Chino takes a seat on the twin-size mattress. “Not your sister?”
I nod. “Nope, and I’ve also been fucking her long before I found out she wasn’t.”
“Yo, that’s fucked. Umm. Okay.”
I notice the confusion spread across his face as he runs a hand over his baldness. “Don’t look at me like that. She’s not my sister, so it’s alright. No?”
“Man, whatever floats your boat. But now that we’ve got the confession out of the way, what the fuck does it mean?”
Finishing the blueberry-flavored Monster drink, I crush the can between my palms before aiming and shooting it at the small trash can by the door. “It means that I need to find the woman I love and clip her wings so she can never leave me again.”
Chino lets out a whistle. “Man, that’s some fucked up shit. I don’t know if I’m just too twisted to be surprised, but this is like a novela. So much drama and shit.”
Only this isn’t a novela, it’s real life. I don’t tell him the truth—that I’m preventing Tokyo from running into trouble. Fucking Trouble. But my Trouble.
“Kai? One more question.”
“What’s up?”
“Did you know Lalo wanted Tokyo?”
The question doesn’t take me by surprise—it wasn’t like Lalo hid the fact that he wanted her, but I told him to stay away even as I slipped inside her because I was selfish. I never gave her a normal chance to explore anyone outside of me… becauseI wanted to be everything. I played into her charms and worked hard for the one girl I couldn’t have.
“I did.”
He nods. “Did you think he knew?”
“I do.”
We don’t talk anymore about the fact that I fucked my maybe half- sister or the fact that I love her and still very much want to fuck her. The drive to the meet-up spot is quiet—only the hum of the car’s engine and the nightlife fills the space. Chino looks out the window as he smokes his cigarette in silence, probably processing everything. I wonder if any part of him regrets saving me. But all that sentimentality comes to an end as I pull beside a white Subaru with a driver dressed as a slenderman. He revs the engine as we pull into the empty lot where tons of other drivers wait for their turn. The scent of burnt rubber, marijuana, and oil is carried in the night breeze. “No Heart,” by 21 Savage, blares from someone’s speaker and simultaneously competes with “Booker T,” by Bad Bunny, from another. It feels like home, and all I’m missing is my wingman.
The first, and only woman I let drive my car—showed her the thrill of the race.
Tokyo
My phone rings, interrupting the music blaring from the car speakers. My heart sinks, fingers hovering over the green call button before I finally answer.
“Hey.”
“Hey, we are here, where are you?” Xena shouts over the music and the sound of revving cars. I watch from across the parking lot, trying not to focus on the single black Audi that sits by itself.
Waiting…
Watching…
“I’m about to pull in.” I try to hide the quiver in my voice.. It’s not like I wanted to do this, but I have no choice. It’s her or him. Unfortunately for her, I will always choose him—somethingRoman and I can probably relate to. We will go to no end to protect what’s ours.
“Okay, hurry. I think I convinced Ro to race.”
I can hear the smile in her voice. As a matter of fact, I see it as she wraps her arms around Roman’s waist and he places a kiss on the top of her head. “What is he gonna use, my car?”
