Standing on my tip-toes, I press my lips to his, the rest of the world suddenly not mattering in the slightest.
18
ZAYDEN
MY HEAD THUMPS WHENmy eyes open the next morning.
I’m already dreading what’s to come today, and the last thing I need is to add a hangover into the mix.I’ve slowed my drinking down since being with Nora.Being around her has made me feel a lot less alone in the world and drinking doesn’t seem like the answer to all my problems anymore, but we both let loose last night and now I’m suffering the consequences.
I’ve been debating my plans all week.To go to Mum’s and sort things out or not.I know I should and it’s been long enough, but then I think back to what happened and I get hurt and furious all over again.I still have nightmares of my stepfather’s fists pummelling my skin.
‘Good morning,’ a soft voice murmurs, pulling me from my thoughts.
‘Morning Vixen,’ I reply.‘How’d you sleep?’
‘Like the dead,’ she admits with a sheepish smile.‘Why did you let me have five cocktails?’
I shrug.‘I’m a sucker for those pina coladas.If I was going down, I was dragging you with me.’
She giggles, tucking a brunette strand behind her ear.Light freckles dust her cheeks, and her eyes look ultra blue when the strips of light from between the blinds filter across them.
‘How are you feeling?You look like you have a lot on your mind.’
‘I’m just thinking about Mum and how much I don’t want to deal with any of this.’
‘I get it.It’s easier to bury your head in the sand sometimes.’
‘Doesn’t make it go away, unfortunately,’ I say with a wry smile.
Her gaze is soft and our legs are tangled together.Having her here grounds me.I know this is something I need to do.
‘It might be like a weight off your shoulders,’ she says.‘I hope.’
‘Me too.Are you sure you’re fine here?’
‘Of course.I have writing to do.’She cracks a smile.‘I know it’s hard for your extroverted brain to understand, but leaving me on my own with my laptop and Kindle is one of the kindest things you can do to me.Never worry about me when you have other things to do.’
‘Okay,’ I say, matching her smile.She has to be the most relaxed, unproblematic person I’ve ever dated.
We get organised for the day and have some fruit that the owners of the Airbnb provided us.Stomping into my shoes, I backtrack to the lounge room and lean down, kissing her.
‘I’ll be back soon.’
‘Good luck,’ she says, squeezing my arm.
Dread accumulates in my gut as I make my way over to the house.The salty breeze of Bliss Bay reminds me of my childhood.I take the scenic route, driving by main beach.The golden sand is littered with sunbakers already.Everyone here surfs and swims, it’s just the norm.
A few short minutes later, I’m pulling into the driveway.The house looks different.Brighter, with bigger plants occupying the garden at the front of the house.The fence has a fresh coat of paint.The colour of the window trimming has changed.The house looks good.Better than before.Fresher and more like Mum’s style.
I have hardly cut the engine when Mum appears on the porch, a look of shock registering on her face.She stares in disbelief as I get out of the car.Burying my hands into my pockets, I slowly walk towards her, surveying the house.It’s not felt like my home for a long time, and it feels weird to be here.Especially knowing that he isn’t anymore.
‘Zayden,’ she says, looking me up and down like she hasn’t seen me for years.It doesn’t feel like long ago that she showed up on my doorstep.‘Hi.’
‘Hey,’ I reply.
‘You’re here,’ she states.
‘I am.’
