‘Does it feel better, having all his things gone?’
‘Yes,’ she replies, nodding. ‘I didn’t think it would, but it’s been like a cleanse.’
I study her for a moment. There are so many things I want to ask her – about Rod, about Zayden – but I can’t get any of the words out of my mouth. Did she suffer, being with him? I never got that impression, but I also never picked up on anything happening between Rod and Zayden, either.
‘Are you okay?’ I eventually ask.
‘I’ve certainly been better,’ she replies, fingers tapping restlessly on her thighs, a nervous habit I inherited from her. ‘But, yes, I’m okay. I miss you a lot, and your brother.’
Chewing my lip, I nod. There are so many emotions swirling inside me, I’m unable to decipher exactly how I’m feeling.
‘I know things will never be the same, and I don’t expect you to understand everything that’s going on or forgive me for the things I’ve done ... but I need you in my life, Anya. I appreciate you coming to see me today.’
Swallowing the emotion clogging my throat, I nod, not trusting myself to speak.
‘I’m going to make some tea. You want one?’ she asks, jumping to her feet, as if desperate to escape the tension-filled room.
‘Yes,’ I force out. ‘Thanks.’
As she disappears around the corner, I lean back, pressing a hand to my chest. Feeling my phone vibrate, I pull it out and reply to Mason’s text. Noticing a new email, I click on the app and begin to skim through it. My jaw hits the floor as I gape at the screen, not believing what it says.
‘What?’ Mum exclaims, rushing back into the room.
‘Oh my God ...’ I trail off, blinking in shock. ‘They want to put my artwork in the gallery show next weekend. They had someone pull out at the last minute and my teacher suggested my piece!’ My heart rattles against my ribcage as I read the words over and over, cementing them into my brain until it slowly sinks in.
‘Oh, honey, that’s wonderful!’ Mum beams.
Immediately, I bring up the group chat I have with Zayden and Mason and press the video-call button. Mum’s face falls when I step outside. I know she wants to be there when I tell Zayden, but he’s not ready to face her yet, and I’m not going to be the person who forces either of their hands.
‘What’s gooood,’ Zayden answers, taking a long slurp of his frozen Coke as he lazes by the pool.
Mason leans in, bumping shoulders with Zayden, his handsome face appearing on the screen. ‘Yo,’ he says.
The words burst out of me, all at once, and they blink at me at first, unable to understand, so I force myself to repeat what I said, coherently this time.
‘No fucking way!’ Zayden exclaims, knocking over his drink as he grapples with not dropping his phone.
‘Yes way!’
‘No surprise there, your art is amazing, Blush.’ Mason grins at me, looking genuinely proud.
‘Book me a ticket, sis, I’m coming to the show.’ Zayden grins, giving me a thumbs up.
‘Me too!’ Mason pipes up. ‘Get tickets for everyone!’
‘Okay!’ I grin back.
When I tried to make and sell art before coming to university, it had been hard not to give up on my dream. It seemed impossible for me to achieve what I wanted. But now, here I am, my art going into a gallery with amazing artists that I admire and look up to. It seems totally surreal thatmyart is going to be on display. Tears spill over my eyes, and I smile at the two boys I love more than anything.
Everything feels like it’s falling into place.
41
MASON
‘IF YOU KEEP LOOKINGat me like that, we’re going to be late.’
Anya’s emerald eyes meet mine, and a smirk plays around her lips as she slowly pulls her stockings up her thighs. I track every movement she makes as the sheer stockings ride up her bare skin.
