Then I’m over the toilet, and whatever was left of my composure is gone.
The door opens behind me.
Monty’s voice comes first, low and calm, like he’s borrowing my panic and holding it for me.“Breathe.Just breathe, Ves.”
His hand gathers my hair back, careful and practiced, like he’s done this his entire life.His palm settles between my shoulders, rubbing slow circles as if he can soothe my body.
Cally hovers at my other side, frantic in the way he tries to hide.“Hey, hey,” he says softly.“You’re okay.We’ve got you.”
I make a sound that might be a laugh if my dignity hadn’t just exited my body.“This is ...so hot,” I manage between miserable breaths.“Really glad you both flew in for the full experience.”
“Don’t talk,” Monty says, as if he’s trying to keep me from spending the last of my energy on performance.
Cally’s hand slides to my arm anyway, fingers curling like he can’t stand not touching me.“She jokes when she’s scared,” he says, like he’s explaining me to Monty and also pleading with me at the same time.Then, he feathers kisses on the back of my neck.“It’s okay.We’re with you.”
“I am not scared,” I croak.
Both of them go quiet, which means they don’t believe me.
When it passes, Monty tips a glass toward me.Cally holds a washcloth under my chin like I’m precious, like I’m breakable, like I’m something he can keep.
I rinse my mouth.Splash water on my face.Blink at myself in the mirror.
I look tired.Washed out.Eyes too bright.
It’s as if I’m standing on the edge of becoming the thing I fear most—the girl who doesn’t get to outrun bad news, no matter how fast she moves.
Monty’s behind me in the mirror, and this time he doesn’t hover.He closes the distance like he’s done it a thousand times—like my body already knows the shape of him.One arm bands around my middle, firm across my ribs, not squeezing, just there.A brace.A claim.His palm spreads flat over my stomach as if he can quiet it by touch alone.
Cally moves in from the side like he can’t help it, like staying back is a skill he never learned.His chest presses to my shoulder, his arm sliding around me from the front, crossing over Monty’s forearm so I’m folded into a stupidly warm, stupidly safe cage of bodies and breath.His hand cups my upper arm and holds, thumb stroking once, twice, like he’s counting me back to myself.
I make a sound that is half laugh, half betrayal.“This is ...ridiculous.You shouldn’t be cuddling me.I don’t deserve it.”
“You deserve everything,” Monty mumbles as he presses his lips on to my temple.
“You’re shaking,” Cally says, voice wrecked.He tips his forehead resting on the top of my head.“Stop pretending you’re fine.”
Monty’s chin dips close to the side of my head, his breath hitting my hair.“You don’t get to go down alone,” he murmurs, and it isn’t a threat.It’s a promise.A vow that he’ll never leave me.
I swallow and hate that my eyes burn, because I don’t cry.I don’t.I’m not built for it.I’m built for jokes and hustle and pretending grief is something you can outrun.
But being held like this—caught between them, their arms crossing over me like they’ve made a decision my mouth hasn’t—does something ugly and tender to my insides.
Cally’s grip tightens a fraction, like he senses the crack.“Hey.Look at me,” he says, and when I don’t, he slides his hand up my arm until he can turn my face just enough.Not forcing.Just ...guiding.“There you are.”
Monty’s arm stays locked around my waist, steady in the way my life never is.His hand shifts higher, thumb brushing under my ribs, and I swear my body remembers summer nights and lake air and the three of us pretending we weren’t crossing lines until we were already over them.
I breathe in.
I breathe out.
The bathroom feels too small for this much history.For this much want that no one is naming.For the way Cally’s mouth is right there, near my cheek, near my ear, like he could say something that would ruin me.For the way Monty holds me as if I belong to him.
For one terrible, perfect second, they fit here.Around me.With me.
We’re one.
It’s almost like the summers when we were younger and reckless and stupid enough to believe love could be larger than consequences.Like the nights when their hands found me at the same time and nobody asked me to choose.Like we were a single breath shared between three mouths.
