Most days she lingered beneath the spray, letting the heat wash the germs, the stress, the endless responsibilities right down the drain.
But not today.
Today she rushed, her chest tight with nerves, her heart pounding so hard it echoed in her ears. Her hands trembled as she soaped up, her mind racing through every scenario. What Archer would ask, what he’d think, what he’d feel about the first man she’d ever let into their lives this way.
She prayed she was ready. More than that, she prayed her son was.
She shut the water, dried off, grabbed her T-shirt and shorts and dressed quickly, then went up the stairs, but didn’t see Archer anywhere.
When she heard the faint laughter, she realized he must have gone to the front room to play video games. He wouldn’t get much time this weekend there, not being home or Jayce being around, so he was taking advantage of it.
She had to remind herself that Archer was still eight and would squeeze in what he could when he knew there was a time limit.
“Hey,” she said, walking into the room. “Can you pause that so we can have a chat?”
“Moooommmm,” Archer whined. “I wanted to play before Jayce came. I won’t be able to tomorrow.”
“I know, but we need to talk, then you can go back to it.”
“Will it take long?”
“Depends,” she said. “On you.”
His shoulders dropped and she hated that for him. That he thought he was going to get in trouble when he’d been so proud of himself over his report card.
He paused it and put the controller down. “Did I do something bad?”
“No,” she said, smiling and reaching for his hand. He let her touch it for a second and then she dropped it away. “It’s about Jayce.”
“Is he not coming over tonight?” The disappointment filled Archer’s eyes. She wasn’t sure if that was good or not.
“He’ll be here,” she said. And he was just as nervous as her. She’d send him a text shortly to let him know how it went.
“Good,” Archer said. “It’s going to rain later so maybe we can play games since I’m not getting them now talking to you.”
She squinted at him. “Maybe. You like Jayce, don’t you?”
“I do. He’s great. He likes to spend time with me and hang out. You like him too, right?”
“Yes.” She took a breath and swallowed past the lump in her throat. “Would you be upset if Jayce was more than just your friend? More than a friend to me?”
“Is Jayce your boyfriend?”
She wasn’t so sure that was the word she’d put on it, but the fact she was letting her son know said it was the right term for Archer to understand.
She and Jayce hadn’t had the exclusivity conversation, but she didn’t think they’d need to. He was fully aware of what she thought of cheating and she knew he felt the same.
“Would you be upset if that were the case?”
“No,” Archer said. “But will he want to be with you and not just me? Is he only being nice to me because of you?”
One scenario she’d come up with and was glad her mind went there in preparation.
“He’s not. Remember, he spent that first week with you. It’s been all about you from the start.”
“And now because he’s been spending time with me he likes you again? Like when you were in school before? Was he your boyfriend then?”
She hadn’t thought he’d ask this. “He was.”
