I step into the newly inspected elevator and blow out a slow breath. “Alessia is newly divorced. I don’t know what she wants next. I think she might not even know what that is. I know the night we had our blind date was her first time really putting herself out there again with men. Maybe she’s just trying to have fun.”And maybe I need to let this entire obsession with her and jealousy around any other man who looks, talks or shows interest in her, go.
Roman nods. “Yeah, I remember when you and Amber first go divorced. You had that 'spell'that you went through.”
“Don’t call it a spell.”
“What would you prefer I call it? That ’brief stint where you fucked every single woman in Brookhaven?’” he asks.
I let my head fall back against the cool metal wall of the elevator because that’s not accurate, but it’s not entirely wrong either.
Overnight, I went from being a husband to my college sweetheart to being a guardian and a dad. My ten-year-old sister suddenly looked to me for everything. Food, school drop off, homework, bill payments, and good, quality advice. I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. When I woke up each morning, I had no idea what was waiting for me that day. Every moment was full of heavy emotions and new challenges that I had no support or experience to navigate. A lot of times, I felt like I was failing at everything. Most days I was just trying to survive and make sure Rhiannon and Eden were too.
My parents’ death left behind thousands of dollars of debt that didn’t just disappear when I laid them to rest—it became my problem and Rhiannon’s problem. I felt a heavy responsibility to be sure she finished college and started in her career without sacrificing her youth just because we were drowning. The family thrift store barely stayed afloat and the furniture we sold there that I refurbished was just another task on my long list of to-dos.
Add to that a brand-new wife who hated the idea of us moving back into my childhood home and taking guardianship of Eden, who resented every second I spent fixing what my parents left behind instead of building a new life with her and abandoning my sisters. Well… I fucking snapped when she handed me the divorce papers and said she no longer loved me.
I went wild. Burned through every vice I could find to cope with the deep loss of my parents and spouse that I’d vowed to love through everything. Until I pulled my shit together and decided I needed to act like a man and not a child.
Since then, I haven’t dated. Haven’t even entertained the ideaunless it was a one-off occasion. And since Aly, I’ve thought of no one, I’ve touched no one, except her. And maybe that’s because before her, I wasn’t ready either.
“Do you think Aly’s going to have aspelllike that?” Roman presses, bringing me back to the moment.
I hope to hell not. I glare at him from across the tiny box that’s racing to the bottom of our building. He puts his hands up.
“Maybe she needs that.”
I let out a groan. “It’s only been a year since her divorce. I’ve had a decade to deal with mine. It doesn’t even register in my mind anymore. I think it might be too fresh for her.”
Roman doesn’t answer right away. Just leans against the door as it slides open and then steps out into our disaster of a main lobby. Just another thing that I need the crew to focus on this month.
“You might be right,” he says. “She probably isn’t ready.”
“Dammit, you’re not supposed to agree with me.”
He chuckles. “Maybe she needs to go on a few real dates with other guys first. Screw some of them. Get it out of her system.”
“Fuck, I hate the sound of that.”
He shrugs. “You said you told her you don’t want her to see any other guys.”
“Not in those exact words, but I feel like I made it pretty clear that if she’s looking for someone, I’m right here. Under the same roof as her.”
He shakes his head. “Maybe if she does see some other guys, maybe if she thinks it’s her idea, she’ll realize those men aren’t you. That you’re different.”
“Dammit,” I groan again, “I fucking hate that idea.”
His grin turns knowing, like he enjoys the fact that I’m struggling with this. “Ah,” he claps me on the shoulder hard. “Butwhat do I know. I’ve never dated anyone seriously.”
“Kacey wasn’t serious?”
He lets out another one of his booming laughs.
“Cousin.”
That word alone is enough to end the conversation. He moves to the glass doors and pushes them open. I lock them behind us.
“Well, I’m headed downtown. Unlike you, I have a hot date,” he says.
I squint at him. “Dating apps?”
