“Except it’s not pointless, and you’re not going to be ineligible,” I reason, feeling more confident my words are the truth than makes sense. “We can knock out those make-up assignments before the end of the week, and after that, we can focus on the second half of the semester.”
His gaze trails over my face momentarily before he offers me a sad sort of smile. “But what’s the point? What happens if I try and then still end up with the same result? Then it was all for nothing and we both wasted our time.”
“Yeah, that’s a possibility,” I concede, nodding. “Wouldn’t you rather know you gave it your all and failed than to give upcompletely and always wonder? Wouldn’t you rather know you did everything you could, and that maybe some things just aren’t meant to be?”
If I am anything, it’s a realist. I know there’s a chance this could all go sideways—for both of us, actually. But that’s not a reason to not try, in my opinion.
His lips roll inward as his face takes on a pensive expression, like he really is trying to figure out which option is better. Or maybe he’s determining which would hurt the least.
“Why do you care?” he finally asks.
“The real question is why you’re pretending like you don’t.”
“I do. I just…” He looks away, the insecurity I saw yesterday returning in an instant. “I don’t want to feel like I’m taking so much from you and giving nothing in return. Especially if it doesn’t work. I don’t want to waste your time.”
“Don’t worry about that, okay?” I tell him, doing my best to sound encouraging. “You can do this. And you’re not taking anything I’m not offering willingly. I want to help you.”
As soon as the words leave my mouth, I realize just how genuine they are. Just how much I mean it when I say I want to help him. Not because of the deal, not out of selfishness, but because, in a way, I understand what he’s going through.
He needs someone to believe in him, despite how the odds may be stacked against him. Despite him not being able to believe inhimselfright now.
I know what that’s like more than I care to admit.
Hesitation lingers in his gaze, and he shakes his head, whispering, “I don’t know, Little Reed.”
“I get that you’re afraid admitting you need help means you’ll prove people right—that they’ll think you’re stupid. But you’re also the one who said shame is a useless emotion,” I remind him gently. “So I don’t understand why you’re letting it control you. And at what cost? Your entire future? Because that seems like asteep price to pay for the opinions of people who won’t matter this time next year.”
He knows I’m right. It’s obvious from the way his expression softens and his body language shifts, some of the tension in his back and shoulders releasing as his hand drops from the doorknob. So I wait, giving him the chance to change his mind.
Yet a full minute ticks by, and he remains silent and steadfast in his resolve.
I sigh and turn to head into the bathroom, accepting this conversation isn’t going anywhere but in circles with no clear end. But then my name falling from his lips as I pull open the bathroom door halts me in my tracks.
“Logan?”
Turning slightly, I find him rooted in place outside his bedroom, watching me.
“Yeah?”
“I know we were supposed to study earlier but…” He trails off, looking down at the floor, then back at me. “Um, are you busy right now?”
Something odd and completely unexpected happens with his question. Warmth floods to my extremities, almost like my blood has turned into warm tea with honey. It’s the strangest thing, and it takes me a second to realize…it’s relief.
“Let me shower quick, then I’m all yours,” I promise, unable to hide the way my lips curl up at one corner.
A hint of a smile pulls at his mouth too, and he nods. “As a good fake boyfriend should be.”
Six
Logan
“Logan! What are you still doing here?”
I glance up from my pesto chicken cooking on the stove top, only to find Lexi and Willow walking through the front door. Both of them are staring at me a little dumbfoundedly, and I frown while motioning toward the pan in front of me.
“Uh, I’m making dinner. What does it look like?”
Lexi rolls her eyes. “Thank you for stating the obvious.Whyare you still here making dinner?”
