“I want you to stay. Stay right here with me. I’m not ready to leave this room or to letyouleave.” His hands clenched at his sides, and I could see how hard he was fighting whatever battle he was in. “I will, though. My wolf won’t like it. Even the idea is making him want tobreak free, but I’ll hold him back. I’ll get to my room and keep him there, just say the word.”
I slid my hand up his arm, over the curve of his shoulder, and played with the ends of his hair. He was so reactive to my touch. The way he closed his eyes and leaned into it made me want to touch him everywhere. “Thank you for saying that, but I’m not going anywhere.”
His eyes opened, and I could see the hope in them. “You’re not?”
“Nope. As I said already, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be. Aside from my curiosity, I like your company, Rudy. I don’t like being around a lot of people, but you’re different… in a good way. Listen, I don’t want you to feel like you have to censor yourself or apologize for speaking what you feel. I may not know what it’s like to have two sides of yourself that are fighting against each other, but I understand the directness of your wolf. It’s something I find comforting when I’m in the company of animals. In fact, I prefer it to the social expectations in society where people don’t say what they think.”
Rudy stared at me with his mouth open as if he wanted to say something, but instead, he closed his mouth and let out a soft sigh, leaning more into my hand. My fingers trailed up to his hair, circling around his ear, and he hummed softly. There was something really powerful about making such a large man, and a werewolf at that, melt under my touch.
Pushing up on my knees to get closer to him, I lowered my voice and said, “Don’t worry about being too intense; I can handle it.”
His eyes were still closed, but his nostrils flared as he breathed in, breathing my scent in. My gaze lowered to his mouth. His lips were a dark pink that looked so inviting; I wanted to taste them. I wanted to close the distance between us and press my mouth to his. Would his fangs come out if I did? Did I want them to? The thought made my blood heat beneath my skin, and an ache built low and deep within me.
“Fuuuck! You smell so fucking delicious.” It came out in a snarl more than in words, but it only added to the desire I already felt. Was he smelling my interest, or was it just my natural scent that he was reacting to? Either way, it made me feel incredibly sexy.
The hand that was in his hair slid down to his cheek, and my thumb brushed against the corner of his mouth, making him inhale sharply. “I’m going to borrow some of your directness and tell you that I really want to kiss you.”
I’d barely gotten the words out when he lunged at me. In a fraction of a second, I was on my back on the floor with Rudy between my legs, hovering over me. His eyes glowed pink, and his breath huffed hot against my cheek. His human features were enhanced by the glimpse of his wolf peeking through. My heart rate kicked up with the thrill of the wickedly hot being holding himself over me. I was pinned down, unableto move, feeling like a meal. Damn, if that didn’t make me hard as a rock.
Rudy leaned down and pressed his nose to my neck, drawing in a deep breath, making me wish he would lick me, kiss me, bite me—anything. I didn’t know. I was feeling as out of control as I could sense Rudy was, and I couldn’t find a reason to care.
“Nooo!” He was the one that stopped, pushing himself off me so hard he hit the wall behind him with a thud. He covered his face with his hands and shook his head. I stayed on the ground, staring up at the ceiling, as my heart rate settled back down after such an intense moment.
When I finally got my wits about me, I sat up and met his gaze with a half-smile. “Sorry.”
Rudy’s eyes returned to their normal hue. “No. I’m sorry. I want to… but I don’t trust myself.”
“It’s okay. We’re okay. You should know, though, what I want is no less true now, but it can wait.” I didn’t want him to think that I saw him any differently. Hell, he had to have felt my reaction to him. My eyes lowered to the inseam of his jeans. Though they were baggy, there appeared to be a bulge beneath them, too. Shit, that wasn’t going to help, not with him fighting so hard to keep control. I flicked my gaze back up to meet his. “You mentioned lunch? That might not be a bad idea.”
Rudy huffed out a laugh, and he sank down on the floor again, the tightness in his face falling away. “Yeah, agreed. I’ll order some food to be sent down. What do you like?”
“Anything vegetarian would be fine.”
His eyes widened, and his brows arched. “You’re a…vegetarian?”
I settled back onto the couch and snickered at the look of disgust on his face. “Yeah. When you can communicate with and learn the names of the animals that end up on the plate, it’s harder to look at it the same way. But don’t worry, I’m not going to hold anyone else to my preferences. I know you’re a big, bad predator, Rudy. I understand the food web. Carnivores gottacarni. Eat whatever you normally would, okay?”
A smile stretched his lips, and he gave a nod. “Okay.”
After typing on his phone, he carefully approached the couch. I gave a nod toward the cushion beside me in invitation. Rudy sat as far against the side as possible, trying not to touch me. It was an improvement, though. Better than sitting across the room and not as intense as having him on top of me. A happy medium, I supposed. Though I wouldn’t mind having him over me again. Nonetheless, I was glad to see him feeling more at ease.
Bowen
Once our food arrived, we ate in contented silence. Rudy scarfed down two double burgers, looking rather sheepish about it, while I had a delicious ranch veggie wrap. At least Zephyr kept his distrust of me out of the food he served, because everything I’ve eaten here has been amazing. I understood it now, though, why the chef was so in my face when I didn’t think I’d done anything.
Even knowing what Rudy was, or maybebecauseof what he was, I already felt protective of him. From the little I knew of the man next to me, there was a sweet fragility about him. I wanted to pull him into my arms and hold him, and tell him how amazing he was. I got the feeling he didn’t hear that enough. Maybe from his friends now, since it sounded as if they were a solid support system for him, which I was glad for. Something told me that the werewolf side of him wasn’t the only part of him that needed to hear he wasa good boy. Maybe not quite the same wording, but a little praise went a long way.
After we ate, we continued to share stories with each other. It was unusual to feel so comfortable talking with someone, and freeing to be able to share a part of myself I usually kept locked down in human company.
In a quiet moment that settled between us, my exhaustion and full stomach caught up to me, and a long yawn fell out of me. I blinked my eyes hard and shook my head. It had been a rough few nights, and the adrenaline that came from discovering who Rudy was and being hauled back here was wearing off.
Rudy’s warm eyes narrowed with concern. “I’m sorry. I’ve kept you a lot longer than I meant to. You can go if you like.”
I reached across the couch and grabbed his large hand, threading my much-smaller fingers through his. Rudy flinched for a moment before letting out a sigh and squeezing my hand in his. “No. It’s not that at all. I just haven’t been sleeping well, and I’m starting to feel it.”
He slid a glance toward me, but his gaze returned to our interlocked fingers as if it were completely new to him. His hand felt so warm against mine. Rudy seemed to radiate warmth, more so than anyone I’d known before. “Oh? Why is that?”
Feeling the heat of him bleed through my skin was comforting, grounding, even now, as the images frommy nightmares came to the front of my mind. “You know the thing I’ve felt chasing me? The thing the animals warned me about? It appears in my dreams as shadows. A dark hand that reaches for me. I know it’s my mind playing tricks on me, but it feels so real in the moment. I’ve been startled awake each night, fleeing the hand of shadows, making it hard to fall back asleep.”
