“Bananas.” It was the first word that came to mind, and it kind of fit, because this whole thing, every moment since I’d come to this world was kind of bananas.
There was a pause in which I felt his amusement, and my heart clenched with nostalgia, for the familiarity and surety of this connection.
“Very well,” he said. “Bananas it is. I’ll find you soon.” The flame sank into C’ael’s arm, lighting up his skin for a beat before dimming.
C’ael fell away from the pit, his body slumping, and I ran forward to catch him.
He looked up at me with soft eyes filled with shadows, and a fist tightened around my heart.
“C’ael—”
“We should get back to the settlement before the storm gets worse,” C’ael said.
“Are you okay?”
He smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I’m fine.”
It was the first time he’d lied to me.
Chapter 27
THE MAN OF MY DREAMS…
The journey back down the mountain was much quicker and easier than the ascension, probably because I was so fueled with hope. We now had the power to free him in our hands. Or in C’ael’s body, at least.
Jasha spoke of the potential portway in the sea, making plans on how we might access it once the storm calmed in a few days. Now that we had a way to free Araz and stop the primordial evil, the incentive to confirm, one way or another, if the structure was truly the doorway we were looking for was heightened.
Jasha peeled away as soon as we got to the village, eager to speak to his troop. I was left with C’ael and his silence. The slight downturn to his mouth and the slump of his shoulders made my chest hurt. We needed to talk.
The rain picked up before I could instigate a conversation, and we ended up running the rest of the way to our residences.
The building was empty. I followed C’ael upstairs to our quarters, leaving muddy boot prints in my wake. Back in our room, C’ael ushered me into the bathroom with fresh towels, ordering me to change. The flat look in his eyes made my gut squirm with unease.
I stripped out of the wet clothes quickly, drying off and pulling on a dry tunic and loose pants before joining him in the bedroom once more.
He stood by the window watching the storm, his arms loose at his sides.
“Hey.” I bumped his arm with my shoulder. “We should talk about what happened in the temple. The flame and your origins. It’s a lot.”
“It’s nothing I didn’t suspect,” he said flatly. “I’m fine.”
He looked down at me and smiled, but there was no warmth in it. Just…sadness. “C’ael, what aren’t you telling me?” He’d been connected to the flame, to Araz for long minutes while Araz spoke through him. Had Araz said something to him? Something he didn’t want me to know? Heat bloomed across my neck. “C’ael, you know you can tell me anything, right?”
His expression softened. “Yes, I know that, and if there was something to tell, then I would share it, but there isn’t. I just feel…different.”
Of course he did. Not only had he absorbed a flame that belonged to a djinn god, but he’d also just discovered he was a part of that god. That he’d been born from divine essence. Fuck, that was a lot for anyone to take in. It was probably spawning questions about autonomy and existence, and for someone already struggling with figuring out his place and purpose in a world he was dragged fully formed into, that was an added layer of confusion.
“I’m not sure how much of my conversation with Araz you heard, but I want to reiterate, just in case you didn’t hear it…You are your own person. Your own entity. You may have come from Iblees, but you’re now C’ael. Like an ember jumping from a hearth to start its own fire…That’s what you are now. You…are you.”
His throat bobbed, and his eyes misted. “Thank you.” He pressed his palm to his chest. “But I feel him now. His fire inside me. I’m…I’m afraid…”
My scalp prickled. “Of what?”
“That it might consume me.”
My pulse skipped. The thought of losing him, of him being consumed. Of him ceasing to be him made me cold. “Did he say that to you? That there was a risk or?—”
“No,” C’ael said quickly. “He didn’t say that, I just…” He exhaled and shook his head. “It’s just so much to take in.”
