“Old ladies gossip like crazy, watch out for the ones who don’t.”
“Will do.”
I kiss her three times, just in case I don’t see her throughout the day. The boys are still asleep in Roman’s cot, and I quietly close the door behind me. I tracked down Shane’s parents’ phone number, but they adamantly informed me they had no son. I managed to tell them he had died but they told me he had been dead to them since the day he joined a biker gang. I hung up, confused. Shane always made out he spoke with his family regularly, proving you never truly know someone.
Downstairs, I turn on the coffee machine for Holly so she doesn’t have to bother with it when she comes down, and then I let myself out. Dad is sat out on his porch, staring out at nothing but destruction. He doesn’t see me approaching and doesn’t acknowledge me as I sit on one of the porch chairs. He's still smoking, finishing his cigarette and immediately lighting another.
I'm content to sit in the silence, but he eventually murmurs, “This is what the world looks like when you fight on the attack.”
It's a blow but I swallow it and refuse to let it show. “My plan was solid. How was I to know we had a traitor?”
He tuts and flicks the ash from his cigarette. “You’re talking like a solider. A president is always on the lookout for traitors. Not everyone who wears the patch remains loyal.”
Wringing my hands together, I grate out, “I ain’t gonna apologise for doing what I know is right.”
Dad stands and finally looks at me. “Then we’ll have to bury more brothers before this war is over.”
“Dad...”
“Nah, there ain’t shit you can say right now that I wanna hear.”
The front door closes behind him and I stand from the chair. The tension in the air remains, though no one is around. Blood is still puddled on the gravel. Thunder rumbles above and if rain doesn’t come, the last living prospect will have to get his ass out here and wash it away. I kick at the gravel trying to cover the stains. Dust kicks up and I waft my hand to clear it from my face. Charred spots are dotted around the gravel from the petrol bombs, and I grit my teeth.
It might not have sunken in yet, or it may have, and I just feel nothing, but Slade, Dex, Shane, the prospect, I can’t think about them when there is too much to do.
Not one brother is up and awake in the bar and I move from room to room, down to the basement, and up to the rooms that used to be occupied with brothers, collecting all guns and boxes of bullets. I dump them all on the tables in the bar and assess the situation. We're going to need many, many more.
Dad is wrong, I made the right call. He's grieving and not thinking about the bigger picture. He should be angry, desperately wanting to hunt down the traitor in our midst. As he isn’t in a position to do so, I will take it on for him.
I fall onto a chair and stretch my arms above my head. We don’t have a lot left to fight with. I'm going to have to call Luca and get him to bring more weapons.
“Daddy?”
My eyes spring open and Rayna is walking into the bar. I stand quickly and try to hide the mass destruction I’ve got spread out on the tables.
I sit on the opposite side of the bar, and she climbs up onto my lap.
“Why aren’t you still sleeping?” I ask her.
After Holly and I sat her down and told her about Slade, she cried until she fell asleep.
“I had a bad dream about Grandpa Slade,” she tells me.
Fresh tears fill her eyes and drop over her bottom lashes. I wipe them away, but don’t bother telling her not to cry. She can shed as many tears as she needs to.
“He was calling my name, but I couldn’t find him. It was so dark, and I couldn’t see him, I couldn’t see anything and then he was gone.”
“Sweetheart, it was a bad dream, that’s all. Grandpa went to sleep and now he’s with your mom. He ain’t in the dark, I promise you.”
“Do you know for sure?” she pleads.
I hate lying to my kid, but if it saves her a minuscule of pain, I can’t hate it all that much. Not today.
“I’m going to miss him,” she cries, going on to ask, “Can you take me to Grandma Kris’s?”
“Maybe you should wait a couple of days, give her some time.”
“She needs a hug. I need her.”
