“That’s good, Momma Cora. Have you talked to Celeste today?” I heard him ask.
“Yes. She’s been here with me for a while now,” she answered as she looked over at me.
“Okay. Tell her I said I love her and to call me when she leaves.”
It wasn’t until the call ended that I spoke. I was trying so hard to keep my mother out of the bullshit I had going on with Allen, but I had to tell her soon. Especially if I decided to take her out of this facility.
“What’s going on with the two of you, Celeste. I could feel that eye roll from a mile away. Are you and Allen fighting?”
“No, Momma. Everything is okay.”
Thank the Lord she didn’t have social media. If she did, it would be damn near impossible to lie about Allen’s cheating ass. The less she knew, the better. I’d come clean once I was footing all her bills.
“Celeste, you keep saying that. I’m no fool, especially when it comes to a man. You and that boy have been at odds for quite some time now. I won’t pry since you don’t wanna talk but know I’m here whenever you need me. I may need you physically, but I’m still your mother,” she stated seriously.
“I know, Momma. Get some rest and I’ll call you in the morning.”
I placed a kiss on her forehead and made sure her oxygen was secured before turning the light out and leaving her room. I waved and spoke to the nurses I was familiar with as I left the building. When I got to my car, I placed the bag filled with mymom’s things in the backseat and placed a call to Shane. It was now a little past eight and I truly wanted to see him.
“Hello?”
“Yes. I’m about to be on my way to the lakefront. Are you on your way there?”
“I’m walkin’ out to my car now. I’m about twenty minutes away,” he said.
“Me too.”
After discussing where we’d meet once we got there, I ended the call and drove the rest of the way listening to my favorite R&B girlie, Marshall. Marshall had only been mainstream for less than a year, but she was killing the game. She gave that nineties vibe and I loved the way she told stories in her lyrics. Being with Allen, I’d been in the same proximity as her a time or two, but I’d never been close enough to have a conversation. Her debut album and mixtapes had gone triple platinum in my car alone.
When I approached the light to turn into the small parking area of the lakefront, I spotted Shane’s truck. I turned my car off and grabbed a throw blanket I kept in my car just for lakefront trips. Gwendal was bordered by Lake Michigan, so hanging out at the lakefront was a part of life here. I damn near had a heart attack when I saw Shane standing outside my door.
“What’s up, beautiful?” he asked when I was out of the car.
Butterflies burst in my stomach and I couldn’t help but lower my head as I blushed. This man was so damn fine. A mixture of weed and expensive cologne tickled my nostrils. I wanted to ask him what he had on, but I was too busy staring into his light brown eyes.
“Hey, you. How you been?” I asked, unable to think of anything else to say.
“I’ve been good. It’s an empty spot over here,” he said as he took my hand.
As he led me to our designated spot, I cherished the feel of our hands clasped together. Relief washed over me and I felt safe with him. He’d already shown me that he cared when he picked me up after the club incident. If I didn’t have so much shit going on with Allen, there would’ve been nothing in the way of letting this man take me away. Stopping at our spot, I lay my blanket on the step I’d be sitting on. It was always cooler close to the lake and the breeze tonight felt perfect.
“How did the visit go with your mom? She good?”
“She’s as good as she can be,” I admitted as I exhaled.
“What’s the deal with that? What’s happening with her?”
“Heart failure and it’s on the severe side.”
“Damn…I’m sorry to hear that. How old is she?”
“She’s only fifty-seven. She’s too young to be going through something like this. I feel like it’s not fair. I think about her life coming to an end and there are things I haven’t even accomplished yet. I’m scared she’ll never get to see me walk down the aisle or be here to hold her first grandchild,” I admitted.
A shiver rolled down my spine at my admission. I hated talking about my mother’s condition because it made everything more real.
“I can’t even lie and say I feel you because I couldn’t imagine goin’ through some shit like that with either of my parents. Hell, my dad being in prison has been hard enough for me. Even as an adult you never stop needing guidance, so I feel for you. What about your dad? Has he been here for you?”
“I don’t know my father. Don’t know his name or even what he looks like. I used to ask my mother about him all the time when I was a little girl, but she’d talk in circles. I don’t know if she doesn’t know who he is or if he’s even a decent guy. Honestly, I stopped caring after so long. I haven’t mentionedhim in years. I’ve accepted the fact that it’s a part of myself I’ll never know.”
