“It’s mine.”
“That’s what’s up. Well, it was nice seeing you again. I’ll see you in a couple weeks when y’all come pick up your rings,” he stated, making me feel shitty.
Here I was, feeling like a schoolgirl, all shy and nervous in this man’s face, when I was the one with a man at home. Shane could’ve very well had a woman too, but from his empty ring finger, I knew he wasn’t married.
“Thank you. Please let me know if you all need any help.”
While I still had my dignity intact, I made my way back behind the counter and busied myself until I was needed. I’d checked a few emails and even responded to a couple before customers lined up at the counter. When Shane and his mother stepped up, a smile crept across my face when I saw all the items she wanted to purchase. After asking if she’d found everything okay, I informed her about all the products she bought and let her know about our return policy. Once her items were bagged, I took the card from Shane’s outstretched hand and ran it through. The computer printed his receipt, and when I handedhis card back, his large hand covered mine and a wave of electricity jolted through my body.
Like my hand was a hot eye on a stove, Shane pulled his hand away, letting me know he’d felt the same vibration I had.
“It was nice meeting you, Celeste. This won’t be the last time you see my face. Do you have any other locations?”
“No, ma’am. I don’t have any other locations, but I do have an online store. Everything I keep in the store is online and I also have some online exclusives. The website is on your receipt, and if you sign up for the mailing list, you’ll get notified about deals and new products,” I explained.
I was trying my best to stay professional in Shane’s presence, but I kept coming undone. I didn’t know this man from a can of paint, but couldn’t seem to keep it together while he was here. I’d been around plenty of attractive men and this has never happened. The good thing was, I wouldn’t be seeing him again after my rings were picked up. Shane would have me doing shit I’d never do and that was saying a lot.
Checking in at the front desk, I wrote my name on the visitor’s log before being issued a badge. I clipped it onto the collar of my shirt and headed toward my mother’s room. Thankfully, her room wasn’t too far from the front desk. With everything she had going on, I preferred it that way. There was a medication cart across from her door, indicating the nurse was making her rounds. I made it my business to visit my mother at least three times a week. I used to accompany her to the church service they held here in the chapel every Sunday. My mother’s condition had worsened and she now streamed the service from her TV.Now I came every Saturday for a few hours. I believed in getting her out of her room and into the sunlight to help with her mood.
Lightly knocking on her door, I waited until I heard her voice before entering. When I peeked in, I saw my mother sitting in the recliner watching TV.
“Hey, baby. I was starting to think you weren’t coming by today.”
“Ma, I’m only twenty minutes off schedule. I had to finish up at the store,” I responded.
Closing the door behind me, I set my purse on her bed and greeted my mother with a kiss on the cheek. I’d been through a lot with this lady, but I loved her as if our past was nonexistent. Around the time I started Luxe Addiction, I noticed my mother was barely eating. She was always in bed and had a horrible cough that seemed to linger. At first, I thought she’d just gotten hit with a bug of some sort, but things had only gotten worse. The last straw was when I came home one night and she was having shortness of breath. I broke every traffic law getting her to the hospital and it was one of the scariest days of my life. Our lives were forever changed when we left the hospital.
Congestive heart failure had found its way to my mother’s doorstep. According to the doctor, her long history of abusing alcohol paired with weakening heart muscles would most likely cut her life short. I cried like a baby when it all registered. If I lost my mother, I’d have no one. She never spoke about who my father was, and from what I knew of her past, I assumed she may not have known who he was. I had no living grandparents and my mom was an only child. This caused a somewhat lonely upbringing, but my mother always made me feel whole.
“I figured you were probably still at the store. But I also would’ve understood if you needed a break this weekend. You work hard, Celeste, and I know that. I would’ve been okay if you rested today.”
“I’m okay, Momma. I’ll rest when I leave here today. Have you eaten yet? How has everyone been treating you?” I quizzed as I separated her curtains.
“Child, you ask me the same questions every time we talk. I promise I’ll let you know if I’m ever having a problem in here. Nurse Nicki makes sure I’m good when she’s here and we got a new nurse on the hall yesterday. She’s young, but seems nice. Sit down and tell me what’s been going on with you.”
Sitting on the neatly made bed, I decided to get comfortable and slid my heels off. Once my feet were tucked under me, I opened the throw blanket and covered myself with it. Truly, I was tired but not sleepy. I was tired because my brain never stopped. Different thoughts and ideas ran through my mind all day. I had goals I was trying to accomplish and often interpreted that to mean I always had to be productive. Whenever I had a day to rest, it was filled with writing down ideas to make more money. Laying back on the firm pillows, I let out a sigh before speaking. I’d never go into detail with my mother about everything I was dealing with. The last thing she needed was added stress. I gave her enough information to ease her mind, but she always knew I was holding back.
“I have a photoshoot next week for the upcoming collection drop. I’m nervous about how it’ll do,” I vented.
“It’ll do well like any other design that was once new. You create for yourself. If you love it, that’s all that matters. Stay authentic and the right people will catch on.”
“It’s hard sometimes, Ma. I don’t know what I’m doing for real. I don’t have anyone guiding me and telling me how to improve. Everything is trial and error, and that’s frustrating at times. A few weeks ago, one of my manufacturers messed up a whole batch of purses and I didn’t know what to do. I’d been sending out emails, telling everyone the purse would be in stockon a certain date, just for it not to happen. I feel like that made me look unprofessional.”
“That’s what comes with the territory, pumpkin. Sometimes, even when we have a plan, things can go wrong. What’s important is that you don’t stay in that space. The purses aren’t right; so what’s next? You gotta keep going. All you can do is keep communication open with your customers. If they don’t wanna wait, refund their money and move on. I can’t tell you how many businesses have failed because people don’t know how to let go. No one wants to issue a refund, but it happens. Don’t hold on so tight to one person’s dollar that you forget about the people behind them. One person won’t have your empire crashing.”
Letting my head fall back, I thought over everything my mother just said. She was right, but it was easier said than done. It didn’t matter how many videos I watched or books I read, running a business was a rollercoaster.
“Thank you, Momma. I needed to hear that. I just want everything to be right.”
“I know. You’ve always been a perfectionist and that’s a big part of the problem. I always want you to put your best foot forward. I also want you to embrace your struggles and failures too. Whether it’s good or bad, it’s all a part of the testimony. You’ll be okay, pumpkin. Now, get some rest.”
Tears fell from my eyes at my mother’s words. She told me everything I needed to hear and planned to apply. The tears were also out of sadness. Knowing her days were numbered was killing me on the inside. To think that one day I’d no longer be able to sit with her and hear her voice was unsettling. It wasn’t until my mother lay on the bed with me that I noticed my cries were now audible. Wrapping an arm around me and resting her chin on top of my head, my mother held me as I wept into her chest. No words needed to be exchanged because she knew whatwas wrong. I needed her and she needed me to be strong. I cried to the point of exhaustion. My lids were heavy and the last thing I remembered seeing was the set of praying hands that sat on the windowsill. It would take all of my strength to get through that tragic day.
CHAPTER 5
Shane
“That shit gold, my boy. Whoever rappin’ over it needs to come with that heat. Shit is too lit to have some weak ass lyrics behind it,” Tripp said as he passed me the blunt.
