Beans walked over toward Zu. “I think I may know where he is.”
We all began to head toward the cars when Chevy stopped us. “Nah, Dio needs this time with Zu. Beans, take him. Peanut, Streets, y’all come with me. Scooter,” he paused.
Scooter held his hand up. “I’m good. I’m going back to my girl. When y’all find out that he’s good, just let me know. That’s my twin, and I get it,” he said as he hopped in his car and backed out.
The way Chevy looked at me, he knew that pointing my brother and me out was about to turn into something big.
When we were back inside Beans’ crib, he looked at us both. “Tell me what you two niggas been up to,” he demanded.
Jalen glanced at me. I shook my head. “Basically, Jalen’s been looking out. He’s been carrying me through college,” I mumbled.
Chevy crossed his arms over his chest. “Say what?”
“He’s been doing a nigga’s work.”
Chevy pointed between the two of us. “How did you get in this muhfucka? Because you got to take the SAT or ACT, so—”
“I took it myself and passed. It’s just once I got on campus and got into the groove of things, I felt like I didn’t need to do the work because my skills on the court were more powerful.”
He let off a sinister laugh. “Oh, so you’re a lazy nigga? You’re smart enough to do the work, but don’t want to do it. You’re one of those niggas who think they're too good for the hustle. So, you used your brother, who should be in the same position as you are right now. The nigga who really deserves your seat.”
What he was saying was true, but the way he said it made me angry. “Yes, my brother deserves to be here, but it doesn’t mean I don’t, so chill with that shit, for real.”
Chevy pinched the bridge of his nose. “Do you? Nigga, you’re a junior. That’s damn near three years he’s—” he pointed to Jalen as he walked up to me, “—been carrying yo coward ass. Now stop me when I’m wrong. That nigga has passed courses for you. That nigga has made you look like the fucking scholar you are. It sounds to me like you don’t deserve shit, and when you fuck over good people, bad shit happens to you,” he finished as his eyes landed on my foot.
He turned to Jalen. “What do you want? Huh? I’ve watched you carry your brothers, but what about you? What does Jalen want? That shit y’all were doing stops today. Do you want to be at TSU?”
Jalen looked at me, then back at Chevy. I knew my brother wanted to be in college despite his speech impediment. Jalen had the potential to be great, and I was being selfish. I knew I had fucked up, and although Jalen was forgiving, it was me who couldn’t forgive myself.
“I-I-I wa-wa-want to—” he closed his eyes as he slowed down, “—to go to college,” he got out smoothly.
“Then we’ll make that shit happen. Streets, now is your time to figure your shit out. Just as you want to be successful, sodoes he. Don’t hinder the great because those are the ones who open doors for niggas like you. As he been doing,” he said and walked off.
Jalen looked at me. “S-s-s-s-sorry.”
He didn’t need to apologize for being his brother’s keeper. Now it was my time to sit in the fucked-up shit I’d done.
SAMARA
PRESSPLAY
My body curled into a fetal position as I sobbed. I sobbed all night because I would have never imagined that Dio and I would get to that point. There were so many emotions going through my body. To see the man I loved filled with so much anger toward me hurt, but to know I could no longer hold how I was feeling inside hurt even more. The regret that swallowed me up was becoming unbearable. Zaria cuddled behind me as she rocked me back and forth.
“It’s a part of falling in love, Samara. This is why I told you to slow down.”
“Why does it hurt so bad?” I sobbed louder.
“Oh, Samara. It’s love, it’s passion, and it’s the desire to feel happy. What you were trying to get out of you and Dio’s situation was what you’ve seen others go through, but you guys are not them.”
My shoulders bounced up and down. “We were supposed to be like you and Chevy.”
“Samara, you and Dio are nothing like June and me. If that’s what you were expecting, sweetheart, I’m sorry. If you think the words Dio said to you hurt, oh, sweetie, your dad is ten times worse.”
I lifted my head. “You two never argue.”
Zaria’s head flew back. “Says who?”
I stared at her in confusion. “I’ve never seen you two argue.”
