I felt like she hoe’d me. She and I did have an understanding, but her acting like I was some random-ass nigga was crazy. A nigga like me couldn’t really display the emotions I wanted to because what people saw when they looked at me was a nigga who could pull many bitches, and relationships were something I knew nothing about. However, they were all wrong. I had ninety-nine problems, and being a dog-ass nigga wasn’t one. There was a lot riding on every move I made. This year wasn’t about making stupid-ass choices, but smarter moves. This was bigger than being a star football player. This year was about making grown-up decisions that would shape not only who I was but also my bloodline.
SAMARA
PRESS PLAY
We stood in the far corner next to Streets and a group of his basketball-playing friends. It felt weird calling him 'Streets' when everyone else called him 'Xavier'. It didn’t seem to bother him, so we just went with it.
Dio stood behind me with his arms wrapped around my waist as we moved to the music. He begged me to come out tonight since school was starting soon. I honestly wasn’t feeling it. I was more worried about what happened during Christmas break than us being in a club with a bunch of people we had to look at for the next few months.
I pulled myself away from Dio and turned toward him. “I want to leave,” I whispered in his ear.
Dio’s eyes stared at me, confused. “We just got here.”
“I know, but I’m not feeling it.”
Dio dropped his head before his eyes rose back to me. “A’ight. Fuck it. Let’s go.”
I knew I was being a Debbie Downer, but my mind wouldn’t turn off. Seeing my friends having these beautiful moments with their men while mine just acted like I wasn’t supposed to feel somekind of way bothered me. I wanted to talk about how I was feeling, while he wanted to be in here having the time of his life. He turned to Streets and dapped him up. He grabbed my hand and led the way to the front. As we got closer to the exit, I spotted Phoebe, who gave me a quick wave when she saw me. Dio pulled at my arm, causing my body to jump forward, making me shoulder-bump someone.
“Sorry!” I tried yelling over the music.
The guy didn’t respond but winked at me before patting my ass as he walked by. When Dio turned around to see why I hadn’t moved, I could see his eyes bouncing on the guys near me as if he knew what happened.
“Are we leaving or staying?” he asked.
Wrinkles formed in my forehead. “That guy touched my ass,” I told him.
Dio’s face changed almost instantly. “Fuck did you just say? Which nigga, Mars?” he asked.
I turned to show him, but the guy was nowhere in sight. I looked back at Dio. “I don’t see him.”
Dio let go of my hand and walked up to the first guy he saw. “Was it this nigga?” he asked while pointing at his face.
I shook my head. He was losing his mind as he went guy to guy. The last one he walked to, he flicked his hat off. “Him?”
The guy shoved Dio. “Nigga, don’t get yo’ ass beat in this bitch!” the guy snapped.
I thought Dio would back off because he did come at the guy wrong. However, he did just the opposite. He rushed back into the guy’s face. I couldn’t hear what he was saying, but I could see words were being exchanged. I wasn’t sure how Streets got to him so quickly with the boot on his foot, but he stood there talking just as much shit as Dio. Security came through, pushing people aside. They stood between the guys.
“If y’all don’t want to get banned, you niggas better chill out!” he yelled.
Dio slowly backed up as he laughed wildly. I rushed to him and grabbed his shirt to make him face me. “Relax. It’s not that serious.”
He ran his tongue across his lips. “Let’s go.”
As soon as we were outside of Hoodoo’s and near the car, he turned to me. “Samara, let me tell you this, and I’m only saying it once. That Keith shit was minor. I will kill a nigga out this muhfucka. My mind and morals will be gone. I’m truly a nigga who doesn’t give a fuck. Act like you know whose dick you're riding because if you don’t, somebody is going to be burying their fucking kid,” he snapped, then hit his alarm to unlock the door.
Although he seemed angry, he walked over and opened the door for me. Before he closed it, he leaned in. “I love you more than you know. I don’t want to choose violence, but if I have to, I will be Demonysus out this bitch.”
A laugh fell from my lips before I got serious. “Would you really kill for me, Dio?”
Without blinking, he gazed at me sincerely. He placed his forehead to mine. “Just as Chev would for Z.”
I swallowed deeply. I had seen different versions of Dionysus, but never the side of him that spoke freely of killing someone. Everything I’d been told about him was becoming more evident as Dio slowly shifted into the man who felt more like Chevy than the boy I’d met back in New York. Now we were stepping into another semester, and with Dio like this, I wasn’t sure what to expect. He went around, got in and sped out of the parking lot. He turned the music up as we made our way home, but I turned it down.
“I want to know what that was during Christmas break.”
He glanced at me quickly before he focused back on the road. “Mars, don’t,” he mumbled.
