I ran my hand nervously over my waves. “It’s the fraternity in general. Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m happy I’m here, but to be honest, Ms. Cecily, things are different when you’re on the line. It gets dark, lonely, and tiring. Jesaiah is only a small portion of the problem,” I started. “I could have chosen any school to go to, but Toussaint State was my first pick, not only because it was close to my brother, but because it’s a college for people who look like me. The problem comes in when people who look like me use small pieces of power as tools. I’ve seen you around campus, encouraging and trying to do right by the mission, but you should have used that time to teach your nephew some things.”
She nodded. “You know, you’re right, but the answer is simple. You cannot save someone who doesn’t want to be saved.”
That was what she said now until that nigga’s body was floating in the Dead Zone Lake. She turned up her jazz music. “Back then, jazz music saved lives. It was born to create a voiceless expression used by instruments. It was a Black thing,” she started as she swung her head. “You know, Jesaiah’s father was a composer. My brother loved the music. He just knew Jesaiah would pick up where he left off, and his mother, Toni, my goodness. She swore he would be a star. I knew, given how he was left behind, he would be searching for his parents' attention, craving the love one begs for. I knew it would destroy him.”
I placed my elbow on my knees. “We all have problems somewhere along the way. I have had many, but that nigga, he’s—”
She held her hand up. “I know. I thought when he came to live with me, I would be able to give him the experience I thought he needed at TSU, that it would save him, like the music. However, what that HBCU did for him was turn him into something I no longer know. So, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.”
She glanced at a picture of her family. Ms. Cecily was a smart woman who knew Jesaiah’s time was up. I stood from the couch and headed for the door. I didn’t need to explain or try to give subliminals because she knew.
“The future I see for you is the same I saw for him. I love him dearly, I do, but I cannot be his savior. I’m old, tired, and have my own things I put on the back burner for him. Give him time. He will see the light. He’s sick.”
I gave her a tight-lipped smile as I walked out the door. I hopped in my ride and took one last look at her. I pulled my phone out of my pocket.
“Aye, Foe, we’re on go!” I said and tookoff.
PERCY
“I want to know everything,” I told Royce as she stepped inside my place.
She glanced around, smiling. “It’s nice, Percy.”
“Yeah, I know, but I didn’t invite you over for that.”
Her eyes softly landed on me. “I said I was sorry.”
“Sorry isn’t what I asked.”
She walked over and sat on the only piece of furniture I had, which was a single couch. Zeus and Sasha offered to get my place right, but they had already done enough. With my job at the Blue Café, I knew I would eventually be able to get what I needed. She patted the seat beside her.
“I’ll stand.”
“Percy, you act like you don’t know me. You act like you weren’t fucking me from the back in my grandma’s house. Relax. Look, when you came into the library, I knew who you were; I did. However, what we ended up being wasn’t on my agenda. My father’s company installed some of the cameras on campus.”
“Wait... I thought you were from the south?”
She smiled. “I was raised there, yes, but my father is from Covana.He owned a security company that was hired years ago to install cameras on campus. Then, his business went down the drain, and he went bankrupt. It caused a wedge in my family, one that they argued about all the time. My aunt Toni convinced my mother to leave, and that was when we moved to the south. My father died, leaving my grandmother here alone. My mother stayed in contact with her, but one day, she called and something wasn’t right. When we came to visit, we found out she had dementia.”
I leaned against the wall as she continued. “Before I knew it, I was living with my grandma and attending school. I’m a tech major, Percy. When Jesaiah found out, he asked me to keep an eye on the line, but he didn’t know where the cameras were, so I did a little research.”
I was so intrigued that I found myself sitting next to her. “You’re a little fucking spy.”
She shrugged. “I’m not a spy. Even though a new company controls the system, it doesn’t mean I cannot access it. However, I’m not the one who started that site. I merely tapped in and saw what I saw.”
I wasn’t sure if I trusted her word. Royce placed her hand on mine. “Percy, I like you; I do. I like what we have and don’t want to ruin it.”
I shook my head. “Hell nah. Honestly, Royce, I don’t think I can trust you. To know you’ve been watching me, hell, watching others, tapping into computers and shit, that’s weird. It sounds fucked up. You're moving like you're on Mission Impossible. It’s weird behavior. I’m good.”
“But Percy, I—”
“No! You and your cousin are fucked up in the head.”
I wasn’t sure what she thought would come out of her telling me that. A nigga wanted to know, but damn. They say it’s always the quiet ones. She stood from the couch, sadly looking at me.
“I think it’s messed up. I was able to give you a chance with all you had going on. I had never done anything wrong. My personal reasons for doing what I did had nothing to do with you. I knew you were sleeping with Phoebe and still chose you. I gave you my body, Percy.”
I didn’t know what to think. I did like her a lot, but I wasn’t sure if I could get over the fact that she was like a fucking spy, and if it wasn’t her who created the site, who the fuck was it? I had questions that needed answers.
