I see the dots bounce up and down, then disappear. Then a moment later, the same thing happens. This goes on a couple of times before a new message finally comes through.
Ash: Have I done something?
Ugh. I knew it was coming. She's right. I have been avoiding her ever since that night.
How can I face my best friend when I know my scum of a father was involved in her kidnapping? She doesn't speak about it to me. I know she's been seeing a therapist, and that woman has done wonders in helping her cope with what happened. Not just with what my father did to her, but everything else as well.
Ash hasn't given me all the details. Only the guys and her therapist know. But how do you ask your friend if the man who is your biological father raped her? I can't do it, so I've avoided her. Well, that and the fact that seeing her pregnant rips my heart out.
Ash: Are you there?
Me: Yeah, sorry. I've just been busy trying to reconnect with Luca. We have a lot of time to make up for.
Ash: Okay, I get that, but don't forget about me.
Me: I won't. How about we have a girls’ night? Me, you, and Arizona.
Ash: Perfect.
Me: Ok. GTG. Luca is here.
He's not, but I can't message her anymore.
I drop my phone on the cushion beside me and pick up the remote, turning on the television. There’s nothing I really want to watch, so I scroll aimlessly through the guide until I find a movie I've watched a million times:Pitch Perfect. It's the only thing that seems to calm my racing mind.
Hank and Luke fill my every thought. I've pushed them away, keeping them at arm's length, but never fully letting them in since finding out about Luca and my father. Now, knowing they both want something with me and knowing for sure that Hank doesn't see a relationship like Ash and her guys have, I can't continue. I need to end it with both of them. However, after today, maybe it’s already over.
When I was taking care of Ash after they rescued her, I felt like something was blossoming with Josh, too, but thankfully I've let that fizzle out. Once she was taken again, my only contact with Josh was when he came to check in on Hank. It was nothing more than friendly banter between us. Lingering looks here and there. Or maybe, I just created something more in my head than there really was.
But then, not three weeks after that night at the club, the one where I almost lost Hank, my world fell apart. I had no one to confide in, to share my feelings with. No one to even help me process all the emotions I was feeling. Ash or Arizona would have been there with me in a heartbeat, but each had their own things going on in their lives, and well, the guys, that was a whole other can of worms I wasn't sure how I was going to handle.
It's best this way. Causing a rift in the club between brothers would be a mistake. They are better off without me. All of them, including Ash, too.
Chapter 3
Luke
Watchingherrunoutof the shop killed me. Then the way her brother glared at me as if he could burn a hole right through me.
“What the fuck happened?” Luca growls already standing from his chair.
“Nothing. Like she said. She’s sick.” I don’t wait to hear what he has to say. I just turn and go back into the room, cleaning up the area. We didn’t even finish her tattoo.
What the fuck just happened? One minute I’m knuckles deep inside of her, and the next she’s running away from me as fast as her legs will go. She told me she loves me, but not just me. She wants to know if I can have a relationship like Vee and Arizona has? She didn’t even give me a chance to process what she told me.
I pick up my phone and message her.
Me: Vee come back or let me come over so we can finish your tattoo and I can do the aftercare.
Me: Let’s talk.
She doesn’t answer. And she doesn’t read them. Yet. Vee’s probably already in her car, speeding down the road. That’s why. At least, that’s what I tell myself as I go through the process of cleaning my station. I can’t shake the feeling that I’ve lost her before I even truly got her.
My next client isn’t for another hour and a half. I can hide in here, or I can go out there and face the wrath of Luca. Neither of them seems like a great option. So, I opt to take my time. Even going as far as to organize the cabinets.
Stone started with Luca first, so he should be done soon and hopefully he’ll leave instead of hanging around. I’m not scared of him. I’m a Hellion. But I don’t want to discuss my relationship with his sister. Not until we can talk.
Hank. She’s in love with him. In love with me.
