"Okay. So what are you saying, Vee?"
"Hank told me he loved me today, but I couldn't say it back. Not because I don't love him," I clear my throat as the tears buildin my eyes.Fuck, this is even harder than I thought it would be.The fact that I could tell Luke I love Hank, but I couldn’t say those three words to him, when he needed to hear them is disheartening.
"So, you love him. Okay. You're here to tell me what we had is over. Guess I should've got shot instead of him." For the first time since knowing Luke, I feel wounded by his words.I'vehurt him.
"First, don’t ever fucking say that again. It would kill me if you were hurt. But there's more I need to tell you." I shift, angling my body toward him, knowing I need to get this out, all thoughts of the tattoo long forgotten.
"What more could there be, ‘cause you're in love with my brother, Vee? You're endin' what we had. Shit, I actually thought we had something. That even though it wasn't an official declaration of you bein' my ol' lady, that's what you were."
"You wanted me to be your ol' lady?" Shock takes over, mixed with some anger. He never mentioned this to me before. Never even gave a hint he wanted any commitment.
"Why are you just telling me this now?" If he had said this before, would things be different? Would I have taken care of Hank after the shooting? Gotten close to him? Developed feelings?
"I don't know. But I guess it doesn't matter, anyway. You're in love with Hank, and I'm left in the cold."
All the emotions swirling inside me are so overwhelming I can't think.
I swing my legs off the table, sit upright, fight the tears and look him dead in the eyes. He needs to know the truth.
"You're a fool. I didn't say it back because I'm in love with you, too. I didn't think you felt the same. To me, I was just your hook-up. A friend with benefits.”
“Like what you love us both? Do you think we are Ash and her guys? Or Arizona and her? Not everyone is them.”
“It doesn't matter.” I interrupt him.
He opens his mouth to continue what he was saying, but this is my time to speak my piece.
“No, I’m not done talking. You’re going to listen while I finish talking. Hank told me very clearly that he won’t share. That it was him or no one. Now you tell me you want me, that you always have. I won’t come between the two of you. I won’t choose, and I won’t be heartbroken. So, screw both of you."
With those final words, I dart up, throw back on my shirt, then frantically grab my bag and rush from the shop, my tattoo not even halfway finished while willing myself not to cry. It’s okay, I’ve had enough of them done that I know what to do. I’ll wrap it when I get home.
“VeeVee,” Luca calls my name as I rush past him, his eyes shooting from me to where Luke stands.
“It’s fine. I’ll call you later. I just don’t feel well.” There's no need to bring him into the shitstorm I caused. He’d want to be my protector, even beat the shit out of the men causing my heart to break. I can’t let that happen.
I just want to be alone. Away from everyone so I can process and think.
I've been holed up in my apartment since leaving the shop earlier today. I’ve been on my couch wrapped up in a blanket, the television playing in the background. But I couldn’t tell you what was on it. My eyes hurt from crying. It’s all I’ve done. My chesthurts, but the pain reminds me how stupid I was to let my heart fall so hard for three men.
Luke has been messaging me nonstop since I left, but I’ve left them all unread. I’m not ready to talk to him or read what he has to say.
His words, the pain in his eyes, told me everything I needed to know. All I’ve caused is trouble and heartache.
The only one I've responded to is Luca, letting him know I'd give him all the details of what was wrong with me tomorrow. He didn't like the answer, but finally left me alone.
My phone pings, alerting me to another message. I almost ignore it, but check who it is, just in case. Seeing that it's Ash, I answer. I’ll never not take a message or call from her. Not with everything that’s happened to her.
Ash: Vee, what's going on?
Me: Nothing. Why?
Ash: Are you sure? You've barely spoken to me outside of work, and even then, you always seem distant. When I was visiting Kaleb at the shop, I overheard Stone talking to Luke about you rushing out.
Me: I'm fine, I just didn't feel good.
Ash: Want me to come over?
Me: No, I'm fine. Plus, I don't need our little momma getting sick.
