Ash: We’re worried.
My fingers fly across the keyboard on my phone, typing out a response to both before I can talk myself out of it. I need to talk to them. To tell them what’s happening in my life and see if they have any advice.
Me:Can you both meet me? Coffee shop near my brother’s clubhouse. Please don’t tell Hank, Luke, or Josh.
Then, just to be safe.
Me: Or your guys. I just don’t need them showing up.
Three dots appear almost instantly.
Ash: I’m on my way. Ryker is dropping me off since he’s with me, but I told him if he told he wouldn’t be getting any.
Arizona: Be there in ten minutes. If you get there before me, order me a Caramel Macchiato.
I slip my phone in my pocket and grab my purse. I stop by Luca’s office and knock on the door, not wanting to just barge in on him.
“Come in,” he calls, from the other side.
Opening the door, I pop my head inside. “I’m going out for just a little bit, to see Ash and Arizona. I’ll be back, though.”
“Be safe.” I go to shut the door but he stops me. “VeeVee, can you bring me back a burger and some fries?”
“Yeah,” I laugh.
I weave back through the clubhouse and head straight to my car, stopping at the gate long enough for the prospects to open it. The entire drive to the coffee shop my heart pounds in my chest. Fear bubbling in my gut that one of the three men who own my heart will show up. That somehow they’d find out I was meeting with my girls.
Before I know it, I’m parking on the side of the road and heading toward the quaint little shop. When I step inside, I see I beat both of them here, so I go ahead and order our three drinks and a few pastries and take a seat at a table in the corner. It’s just out of sight, but still offers a view of the door. The bell over the café door jingles when they walk in, and the second I see them, my chest cracks open.
Ash rushes me first, waddling as fast as her pregnant body can, her arms wrapping tightly around my body. “Don’t ever scare uslike that again. Josh called me, wanting to know where you were, terrified the shit out of me.”
Arizona isn’t far behind her, taking my hand in hers, squeezing tightly as Ash pulls away. “Are you okay?”
I give her a half nod, half shake, my eyes burning with tears. “I didn’t mean to shut the two of you out. I just…I justdidn’t know what to do. I feel like my world is crashing around me, and I just needed to get away so I could breathe.”
The barista picks that moment to call my name, and we step over to the counter to pick up our drinks. Once we sit down, the words finally spill out. Everything. My conversations with both Luke and Hank. Hank telling me he can’t share. Josh spilling that he can. Hank showing up at the bar with one of the club girls. How Josh showed up at the Satan’s Rejects’ clubhouse. And the fact that Luca doesn’t think he’s giving up. When I finish, both of the girls are staring at me over the rims of their cups, mouths hanging open in shock.
“You should’ve told us,” Ash finally says softly.
“I know.” My voice breaks. “I’m sorry. I was just overwhelmed and upset. I thought I could have what the two of you do. But I was wrong.”
“It doesn’t mean that you can’t.” Arizona smiles, as if she believes what she’s saying.
“I can’t. Hank doesn’t want to share. Luke isn’t sure. And Josh is the only one who said he can. I can’t cause strife within the club. And I can’t choose one. All of them have a piece of my heart.”
Ash reaches across the table, taking my hand in hers. “How long are you staying with your brother?”
“I don’t know,” I admit, letting out a sigh. “Until I can breathe again.”
Ash clears her throat. “You can’t hide forever. And call it intuition, but I know that things are going to work out. The four of you will be together; I just know it.”
“If only I had your optimism,” I reply, and then swallow. “But I’m not ready to face them yet. I just need a little more time, then I’ll go back to work. The bills are still there.” I try to laugh, but my heart isn’t in it.
Ash tilts her head, eyes gentle. “What about my baby shower? Are you still going to help throw it? If it’s too much, I’m sure Melissa can handle it on her own.”
My heart stutters. How could I have forgotten about it? The reminder hits like a promise and a threat all at once. I can’t let what’s happening with them interfere with the rest of my life.
I glance down at my coffee, steam curling out of it. “Nothing would keep me from helping to plan it,” I whisper. “I’ll make sure to reach out to her today. And I promise not to shut the two of you out anymore.”
