“No,” I snap at him, my voice raising. “I said I thought about it. But I didn’t. I processed how I was feeling and what was making me want to cut. I didn’t do it.”
“That’s amazing.” He praises me, but I can hear the slight catch in his voice, the way he’s trying to hold himself together. “I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you. Honestly, I’m proud of myself too. But I need to finish getting ready. I just wanted to tell you I love you and that you’re the best big brother ever.”
“But if anything changes and you need me, just have them call. I’ll be on the first flight there.”
“I know.” I wipe the tears from my cheeks.
“Bye, Rivvy.”
“Bye, Stormy.” I don’t wait to see if he’s going to say anything else and hang up.
I put the phone back in my desk drawer, then stand and head to the bathroom to wash my face with some cool water.
Storm’s right; if I need him, he’d be here in a flash. But he needs to be with his pack. With his omega, especially after everything she’s been through. I thought what I endured was bad, but she suffered far worse than I did.
The cool water is refreshing against the warmth of my face. When I’m done, I grip the countertop and gaze at myself in the mirror. The scar on my face, thanks to my father, is a piercing reminder of my imperfection. Of what makes me undesirable. I wonder what this pack will think when they see me. When they get their look at the omega who is scarred and broken. Not that it matters. They’re just a means to an end. A way to get through the heat and then I can go back on my suppressants for a couple more years.
One heat. I can do this. They’re not going to be there until I’m deep into the haze, and when it’s over, they’re gone. I don’t even need to talk to them. All I need are their knots. But it's more than that. Even though I’m no longer a virgin, this will be the first time I’m having sexwillingly.Even if I don’t really want it.
Flipping off the light, I head back to the living room, plop down on the couch, pick up my paperback of Entangled Beta and start to read. She’s the beta I wish I could be. She has a best friend who’s amazing. An alpha who loves her for who she is and not to mention she’s a fucking badass.
I don’t know how long I sit there wrapped up in this magical world that’s been created. I carefully turn the page, engrossed in the story. She’s about to help rescue the captive omega, and I’m here for it.
“Ready to go?” Torin asks, popping his head in the door, and I drop the book as I jump to the side, my arms coming up ready to defend myself.
“Fucking hell, Torin. Why did you scare me like that?”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to.” He holds his hands up in the air, as if he’s being held up at gunpoint.
“It’s okay. I’m just a little on edge. You know, heat and all. About to let some alphas have their way with me.” I give a forced, awkward laugh, but the scowl on Torin’s face tells me he doesn’t find my joke humorous.
“Don’t joke. I’ll tell the guys, fuck this shit right now.” He presses his lips tightly together as he glares at me.
“Torin, you’re getting your panties all in a bunch. I was just joking. But, yeah, I’m ready to go and get this over with.” I stand up from the couch, picking up my discarded book, and placing it on the coffee table.
Torin steps across the room, picking up my two bags. “Is this it?”
“Yeah, figured with what was ordered that I shouldn’t need anything else.”
“Let’s go then. The guys are upset they’re not here to see you leave, but they’re rushing to finish a job so that they can be there when we originally planned.”
I nod, both happy and sad that they’re not here. The next time I’ll see them my heat will be over, and I can put all this behind me.
***
The ride to the safe house isn’t exceptionally long, but with each mile we get closer to it, dread begins to bubble inside me. I can’t explain why, but something didn’t feel right. It has to be the hormones. My body feels like it’s on fire and Torin’s scent becomes stronger, overpowering me. It isn’t bad. It is familiar, but it’s not a scent I want. I crave something else.
“We’re here.”
“Finally, I need to pee.” I shift in my seat, arching my back against the chair. It took us an hour to get here, but you would’ve thought it was longer.
Torin drives up to the gate, enters a code and waits for it to open.
“Are you letting the pack in?” I ask.
“No. They’ll have a special code to get in, separate from the main one. Once they get here and are securely in the room with you, I’ll change the code.”
