“We need to talk, Mel, about what’s goin’ on and something you should know.” He reaches out, taking my hand in his, and guides me over to the couch so that we can sit, our bodies angling so we can face each other. My knee brushes against his and shivers rush down my spine. As much as I want to fight it, my feelings for Earl run deep.
“There’s nothing to say. You made it very clear, even after Ashlynn was found, you wanted nothing to do with me. So why do you care about anything related to me now?”
“Is it not obvious? I fuckin’ love you. I was upset and spoke out of anger and it took me a while to realize I’m a fuckin’ idiot.” He gives me a lopsided grin and shit if it doesn’t melt the ice barrier I’ve placed around my heart where it comes to him.
“Earl—”
“Just give me a chance, let me prove myself to you. Let me in and tell me what’s goin’ on. No matter what, I’m here for you. You’re it, Mel. I know it, but it’s time you realize it.”
Before I can respond, he leans in, pressing his lips to mine, kissing me deeply. Bold scents of charred wood are on his breath as I taste the lingering undertones of spice and caramel on his lips. It’s intoxicating, adding to the sensual desire of the kiss.
His hand slips through my hair, pulling me closer as I turn to putty underneath his touch. I moan and his mouth captures it as I part my lips, allowing his tongue to enter. This is what I’ve always wanted, Earl and me, but why am I also thinking of Jax? I know Earl said he would share, that I could have a relationship like Ashlynn and Arizona do, but when it comes down to it, can he?
Reality crashes in as it fully dawns on me what I’m doing. I’ve got bigger things to worry about at the moment, namely Clayton, and the fact my son is contacting me. I can’t let him reach out to Clayton. I spared him from the life his father had planned for him years ago, I’ve given up too much to let it happen now.
I place my hands on his chest and push away, already hating the absence of his lips on mine. “We can’t do this,” I remind him. There’s no way I can give myself to him now, knowing that I may have to pack up the amazing life I’ve built here and run again.
“That’s where you’re wrong. We can and we are. I told you I didn’t care about the fry cook. If you want him, then I can share. All I want is you in my life, by my side as my ol’ lady. Together, united, we can face anything that comes across our path, includin’ whatever has you so scared and whoever was onthe phone.” He lifts his hand to the side of my face, his fingers gingerly tracing along my skin, before wiping the tear I didn’t know had escaped.
I want to pour my heart out to him, but I can’t; something is stopping me. The fear of my heart breaking even more after finally having everything I’ve wanted, just to have to leave it in the dust as I flee in the night, stops me.
“You’re overthinkin’ it, babe. Just accept you’re mine and tell me what has you in a panic so I can take care of it. Who was on the phone?”
I look up at him, my vision slightly blurred not only by the tears welling up, but the hair that’s fallen haphazardly on my face. I want to spill my guts, to believe everything he’s saying, but if Clayton and his family want me, they’ll find a way, no matter what. The Hellions were able to save me once, but now I have to be able to protect my son. He deserves that, at least.
I sigh deeply, my chest rising and falling with the breath. If I’m leaving, I want this chance with Earl. To know what it’s like to be loved by him so that memory can get me through going back and facing Clayton’s wrath.
“I’ll tell you everything, but I want one thing in return.” My voice trembles and my heart races. This is it; he’s going to say yes or reject me for the final time.
“I’d do anything for you, Mel. You know that.” His hand tenderly cups my head, and I lean into his warmth.
“I want you,” I say the three words I’ve been longing to tell him.
“You have me, baby.”
“No.” I look at him more intently, then reach down, take hold of my shirt, and pull it over my head. “I want you. Then I’ll tell you what you want to know.”
“Are you sure? You’re upset, and as much as I would love to bury my cock deep inside of you, I don’t want you to regret the decision.”
I can’t answer, so I nod.
Earl stands, taking my hands in his, pulling me up.
“What are you doing?” I ask, my eyes wide in confusion. I’m offering myself to him on a silver platter, but is he turning me down yet again?
“My first time with you won’t be a quick fuck on the couch. I want you laid out so I can feast on you, tastin’ every drop of the woman I’ve been jerkin’ off to for more than twenty years.” With those words he scoops me up, carrying me bridal style to my bedroom.
Chapter fourteen
Melissa
Earl sets me down on the bed, gazing down appreciatively at my cleavage. My bra is nothing spectacular and my body isn’t that of a twenty something year old girl any longer. Yet, when Earl looks at me, it’s as if he doesn’t see the wrinkles, the loose hanging skin, and pudgy midsection full of tiger marks. It’s as if he’s viewing me in my prime and seeing me as a model.
“You’re gorgeous.” The words slip effortlessly off his lips. It takes a second for the words to register, and unbelievably, I believe them, rendering me speechless. “Stand up for me.”
I stand slowly, then Earl reaches behind me and unhooks my bra, the straps sliding down my arms before falling to the floor. He groans, then takes hold of the waistband of my leggings, pulling them and my panties down, exposing my pussy to him for the first time. My core clenches as desire floods through me. This is it. I’m about to be with the first man I truly loved, who loved me back.
I take hold of his shoulders as he kneels before me, lifting my legs one at a time, pulling my leggings off. The heat from his breath dances across my neatly shaven mound. When his eyeslinger there, I quickly move my hands, shielding my most private parts from his view, suddenly feeling self conscious. I’ve seen the girls who frequent the club, giving their bodies away for free, and I don’t look like them. I’m older, wrinkled, and let’s just say gravity hasn’t been kind to my breasts and ass.
