Stuff I’ll never know. Stuff I never thought she wanted either… until now.
I take a long pull of my beer, trying to drown it all. Because the idea of her wanting that – wanting it and finding it – is a whole new level of torment.
But if I have to sit back and watch her build that life with someone else, I will.
Because it can’t be me.
She’s my best friend. The only woman who’s ever seen all the ugly and stayed. And I’ll protect that – protecther– if it’s the last thing I do.
‘Sadie baby.’ Theo’s voice yanks me out of my head, his tone snapping the entire room to attention. ‘Will you get out of the tree for a moment and look at me?’
Lottie’s caught mid coin heist, trying to cram a giant chocolate piece into her mouth in one. Her cheeks balloon as she slaps a pudgy hand over her gooey grin, eyes bugging out.
Granny Anna folds her hands in her lap, green eyes already misting with what is to come.
And Taylor…
Taylor pulls Lottie into her lap and sits up straight, lipspressed tight in anticipation. She doesn’t take her eyes off Theo as he helps her sister out of the tree.
‘What is it?’ Sadie asks, big, blue eyes blinking up at him, elf hat jingling as she bobs up and down.
‘Finally,’ he chuckles, pushing his specs up his nose, ‘I’ve got your attention.’
She nips her lip. ‘Was I getting carried away?’
‘A little.’ He plucks stray tinsel from her blonde hair with a smile that could warm the coldest of hearts. ‘Not that I’m complaining.’
No one would dare.
It’s probably her first real Christmas in too many years to count – maybe ever. Lottie’s too. She gets to be giddy.
Hell, she’s even had me cracking the occasional grin today.
And I hate Christmas.
Almost as much as I hate fairy tales.
‘But I do think it’s time the elf got a gift.’
Then he drops to one knee, and Sadie gasps, hands flying to her mouth as she takes in the ring he’s offering up.
Even the kid gets the significance, her shriek drowning out Granny Anna’s sigh.
Me and Taylor?
We stay still. Watching.
Because this, right here, is what Theo was made for. Love. Commitment. The whole damn happy ever after.
And I get it. I get how long he’s loved her. How long he kept it buried, denying himself, torturing himself… I live it every day. Stuck in my own private hell. Yearning, wanting, loving someone I will never let myself have.
The only difference is, Theo deserves Sadie.
He deservesthis.
‘Yes!’ Sadie’s crying, laughing, nodding. ‘Of course, yes!’
Theo slides the ring on and pulls her into his arms. They kiss like the world doesn’t exist, only everyone’s watching.
