Briar wanted to laugh, if only to drown out the voice in her head sayingI told you so. She no longer had it in herself to be mad. Instead, she was numb. It was her own fault, because sheknewAlice, and expecting anything more from her was pointless. Whatever she’d been hoping for Alice to say, she knew now she would never hear.
And honestly, Alice was doing her a favor. Briar had always wished she’d behaved differently all those years ago, that maybe if she hadn’t worn her heart on her sleeve, she wouldn’t have gotten hurt. Well, here was her chance.
‘Yeah, obviously it won’t happen again,’ she said.
They’d done it. It was out of her system. And she’d keep telling herself that until it was true.
Alice stared at her, her expression inscrutable. ‘But… I don’t want us to go back to being at odds either. I feel like we’re in a place where we could be friends again. If that’s something you’d want? I mean—’
‘Sure,’ Briar said, interrupting what she was sure would be a painful rejection and squashing the feeling that she was making a terrible mistake. Alice was leaving in a few weeks anyway. Surely Briar could stay sane for that long.
Chapter 16
Briar
After their morning conversation, things were surprisingly easier between them. It was like the thing that they’d been avoiding since meeting again was now out of the way, and they could move on. They loaded up Briar’s car with supplies, stopped at Alice’s house to get her bag, and then were on the highway headed back to camp before noon.
Briar only lasted an hour in their not-quite comfortable silence, before turning off the highway.
‘Where are we going?’ Alice asked, turning off the GPS so it would stop chirping at them to turn around.
‘You’ll see.’
Minutes later, they pulled into the parking lot of The Grand Ole Diner, a staple from their counselor days. Alice clapped excitedly when the building came into sight. It was a quaint place, overlooked by most in favor of the more convenient fast food places closer to the highway. They walked in and were immediately met with the sickly-sweet smell of syrup and powdered sugar. Briar’s stomach growled as they sat in a booth and immediately ordered caffeinated drinks.
‘So, how’s London?’ Briar asked, hoping that hearing Alice talk about her life would cement the fact that she would be returning to it. She was determined to make it until the end of the summer, be friendly, and part amicably, so that Alice would go back to being someone Briar only wondered about when she couldn’t sleep.
Alice smiled up at the server dropping off their drinks before turning back to Briar. ‘Oh, um, it’s great!’
‘Where do you live?’ Briar asked, sipping her coffee.
‘Shepherd’s Bush,’ Alice said, pouring milk into her tea. ‘It’s a bit of a commute to Oxford, but when Tess moved to London it seemed like the right thing for me too. She thinks it’s mad that I’m still in school, but at least in the city, I have her.’
Briar nodded, pushing away any jealousy towards Tess, and instead tried to remember where Shepherd’s Bush was in relation to her dad’s.
‘I always knew you’d be in school for as long as humanly possible,’ Briar said. ‘I’ve never met someone who likes to learn as much as you.’
Alice shrugged. ‘I like knowing things.’
‘I know.’
There was a beat of silence, and Alice thumbed the edge of her mug. ‘You were good in school, too.’
Briar snorted. ‘No, I wasn’t.’
‘Yes, you were. I cared more maybe, but only because you had an actual life.’
‘Youwere my life outside of school,’ Briar said, regretting the words as soon as they were out.
Alice didn’t seem to notice. ‘Everyone loved you,’ she said, ducking her head. ‘You were the reason I got invited to parties. Even teachers only tolerated me because we were friends.’
Briar stared into her coffee. Alice hadn’t said anything untrue, but while Briar may have been well liked, she’d only had one real friend. There had only been one person who knew her fully, who she could have shared anything with.
‘You were the one with the boyfriend,’ Briar pointed out instead.
Alice flushed. ‘Yeah, well,’ she muttered, ‘that was the only thing I had going for me.’
‘Says Miss DPhil from Oxford.’
