‘What do you think happened that summer, Noah?’ she asked, almost not wanting to hear the answer.
‘I don’t know,’ Noah said, frowning at her. ‘You figured out you were a lesbian, I assume?’
Alice leaned back against the fridge, lightheaded. She tried to think things through linearly, but her brain wasn’t cooperating.
If Noah didn’t know about the kiss, it meant that Briar never told him. Which meant that Alice had some questions for Briar. Questions she needed answered now.
Alice spent the rest of the party trying to get Briar alone, but it seemed that whenever she spotted her in the mass of bodies, Briar would disappear again. Alice had all but given up, nursing her fourth beer by the back door, when Rafa found her.
‘There you are! We’re playing beer pong. Briar needs a partner, you in?’
Alice nodded eagerly and hopped off the counter, stumbling but recovering quickly. ‘Lead the way.’
In the dining room, a crowd surrounded a worn, ornate table. Briar was racking up a set of cups, while Harper poured beer into the opposing set.
‘You said you were getting Noah,’ Briar said, her lips pouting in a way Alice found incredibly distracting.
Rafa shrugged. ‘I found Alice first, and I know how competitive she is.’ He punched her on the arm and winked. ‘Figured this way you may have a chance to beat the champs!’ He pounded his chest.
Alice rolled her eyes but made her way to Briar’s side of the table. If nothing else, she’d be able to corner Briar after the game and ask her the questions that had been swirling in her mind for hours now. They kept coming, tempting her with the possibility of realigning what had happened in the years Alice was gone, the years she had been certain no one wanted her to come home.
If Briar had never told Noah, then a part of Briar, however deeply buried, still was loyal to Alice. Still protected her, even from her own actions. Which meant that Briar hadn’t been able to replace Alice as easily as she’d feared, the same way Alice had never been able to replace the person Briar had been to her.
‘Winner goes first,’ Harper said, bouncing a ping-pong ball on the table and forcing Alice to focus on the scene in front of her.
She easily sunk it into the center cup. The crowd whistled and cheered as Alice drank. The beer was warm and watery, but it went down easily.
Gasping in her next breath, she wiped the foam from her mouth and nodded at Briar, who brought the ball up to aim, her brows furrowed in concentration, her lips wet and open. In that moment, Alice was sure she’d never seen anyone more beautiful, and her eyes stayed on Briar even as the ball sank into a cup.
She pulled her gaze away as Rafa’s next shot bounced off the rim of a cup.
‘Better luck next time,’ Alice chirped, aiming for a cup on the end.
‘Yes!’ she exclaimed when the ball sunk. She raised her hand towards Briar, who eyed it for a moment, as though suspicious of Alice’s good mood, before high fiving her.
Rafa glared at them as he drank. ‘I forgot what you two were like as a team.’
They continued until both sides were down to two cups. Alice had hit her sweet spot of being just drunk enough that muscle memory took over.
‘Nice one,’ Briar said, beaming as Alice sank another shot. Alice would play beer pong for an eternity if it meant that Briar would keep looking at her like that.
Harper passed the cup to Noah, who’d joined the crowd mid-game, for him to drink.
‘Cheater,’ Alice cried, slamming a hand on the table. She misjudged the force of her blow and stumbled slightly. Briar’s hands grasped her arms, steadying her. Alice wished she didn’t notice how warm they were, and how her skin still burned even after Briar had withdrawn.
It was Rafa’s turn to throw, and by the looks of it he wasn’t faring any better than Alice. He squinted, clearly trying to regain his depth perception. Still, the ball landed firmly in the center of one of the cups.
‘Let’s goooo!’ Rafa cried, flexing his muscles for the crowd.
‘We’ve got this,’ Briar whispered. As she drank, Alice noticed a droplet escape from the side of the cup and down Briar’s chin. She pulled her eyes away from Briar’s throat after she’d finally finished what seemed like an endless chug, wordlessly gesturing for her to throw.
‘You got this.’
Briar grinned at her, not looking away as she threw the ball. Alice was so caught up in her gaze, she almost didn’t notice the uproar around them. Briar’s ball had sunk. They’d won.
Briar whooped, slinging her arms around Alice’s waist and jumping in celebration. She tucked her face into Alice’s shoulder and Alice was hit with a floral scent that she knew immediately was the same perfume Briar had used in high school: honeysuckle and bergamot.
In the last decade, Alice had been so caught up in the aftermath of their kiss, had overanalyzed every mistake she’d made the morning after, that she had never considered anything beyond her initial assumption that it had just been practice for Briar. That the kiss would have been the same with Alice or anyone else. But maybe Briar not telling Noah meant that the kiss hadn’t meant nothing to her, like she had said. Maybe it had meant something to Briar the same way it had meant something to Alice.
