So I do. I bring the shirt to my face and breathe in. The scent is different than before. It's much, much stronger. Not bad, but... it's sharp. Burnt wood, bitter ash. It makes my nose wrinkle. Most omegas would probably hate it.
But there's something else underneath. It’s green and alive, trying to push through charred earth. It smells like survival. Like damage that refused to die. I pull it closer. I want to dive into it and sink to the bottom.
"Vee?"
"Yeah?"
"You're going to be okay. It doesn't feel like it right now. But you will be."
He leaves.
I sit on the bed in the quiet cabin surrounded by woods I’ve never seen before.
I don't put the shirt on. Not yet. But I hold onto it.
Everything hurts.
My body. My heart. My head.
I stand and go back to the window.
The same trees. The same distance.
Maybe that's what I need.
Distance from Ragon. From Marie. From the nest that was violated. From the pack that forgot me.
Distance to breathe.
To think.
To figure out if I want to go back or if I want something else entirely.
I press my forehead against the cool glass.
Somewhere out there Ragon's pack is waking up, realizing I'm gone. Maybe they’re looking for me.
Or maybe not.
Maybe they're relieved.
One less problem to manage.
One less omega to juggle.
The thought makes my chest ache.
I close my eyes and I wonder if I'll ever feel normal again.
If there's a version of me on the other side of this that isn't broken.
That isn't afraid or apologizing for taking up space.
Maybe not.
But standing here in this unfamiliar room in this unfamiliar cabin with a pack that lied to me and a future I can't see, I think maybe I want to find out.
Maybe.
