“Dear Nova,”
I exhale again, my voice breaking on those two words.
“If you’re reading this, then you’ve disobeyed a direct order. You’re a massive pain in my ass and bring me stress, even in death. God.” I slam the page onto the table and crush my palms against my eyes. “I’m done. I can’t!” I shake my head. “He could have just said he loves me, and the secret combination to our trillion-dollar inheritance is one-two-three-four.” I draw a heaving, shuddering, chest-aching breath and scrub the tears from my face. “I don’t wanna keep reading.”
“You want me to put it back in the box?” Lincoln strokes my thigh with the side of his thumb. So gentle. So undemanding. “I’ve got the matches.”
“You read it.” I slide it across the table, my chest shuddering with emotion. “Read it out loud.”
“A-are you sure?” He places his hand over mine, but hedoesn’t take Ry’s letter. He doesn’t turn it over or sneak a look. “Nova, are you sure?—”
“Yes.” Sniffling, I tug my hand free and sit back to swipe my face. “Just get me through it. Then I want to leave and drink wine and put on a pair of Spanx.”
He coughs out a laugh that verges on painful desperation. Then, drawing the paper closer, he scans the page for a moment before swallowing and dropping his chin in a subtle nod. “Dear Nova, if you’re reading this, then you’ve disobeyed a direct order. You’re a massive pain in my ass and bring me stress, even in death. Why am I not surprised?” Lincoln pauses and brings his eyes up, his stare a warm prickling on the side of my face. “I’m okay. Wherever I am, whatever is happening, and no matter if it hurt, I’m okay now.”
It hurt.I cry, my chest heaving from its viciousness.It definitely hurt.
“You better not be dating a douchebag. I’ll know if you are, and if that’s the case, I’m coming down there to whoop your ass.Wait.” Lincoln’s tone changes. “That makes me the douchebag, right?”
“Yeah.” I slide my fingers through the hair at the back of his head and draw a shuddering breath. “You’re definitely the douchebag. What else does it say?”
He glances down again. “Do you remember that vacation house we used to go to when we were younger? The one on the river. I always loved going there, Nov. I especially loved it because it was always just the four of us. We made s’mores and threw rocks at each other.”
I snicker and swipe my eyes.
“We rode bikes by the trailhead, and stressed Mom and Dad out, because we never fucking listened, even when they told us what was right and what was safe. We never took our friends there. You didn’tget to bring boys, and I didn’t bring girls. It wasjust for us. Safe and private and untouched by anyone who lacked an invitation. I miss that place…”
Lincoln pauses and brings his eyes up. “He did the three dots there. Like,I miss that place dot-dot-dot.”
“Okay.” I cough out a teary laugh and scratch the back of his head. “Thanks for that clarification.”
He chuckles.
“Sitting by the river at night and staring up at the stars was one of my favorite things to do.If I could, I would take you there right now.Pack your bags, Nova. Get in the truck and drive to the house by the river. I love you. I’ll be watching over you. Don’t do stupid shit.”
My jaw trembles, but I’m smiling, too. My brother is less subtle than a hammer to the face.
“That’s it,” Lincoln concludes, his voice thick and raspy. “It’s done.”
“Really?” I snatch the letter and turn it around. “It really saysdon’t do stupid shit?” I scan the page and pout when I get to the bottom. “Those were his last words for me?”
“Solid advice, really.” Amused, he grabs the box and turns it to the side, peeking into the dark interior. “He didn’t even leave you his rock collection. What a douchebag.”
“Such a jerk.” I shove up from my chair, fold the page and tuck it into the envelope it came in, then I circle toward the door and slip the letter inside my purse. “I’m ready to go, and I recall you offering to cook me a meal.”
“Ididmention something along those lines, huh?” He straightens and pats his pockets, an old habit I’ve noticed in theshort time I’ve known him. Leaving the box behind, he wanders my way and opens the door. “Can we order in, though? I know I mentioned cooking, but that was a lie. I need to buy groceries.”
I wipe my face and move into the hall, my brother’s last words nestled in my purse. Slowing at the reception desk, I wait for the bubbly Tegan’s eyes to come to mine. “We’re done here. Do I have to sign anything to confirm I took my items?”
“No, you’re fine.” She points toward the camera nestled against the ceiling. “Time stamps document everything we need. You’re good to leave.”
“Come on.” Lincoln drapes his arm over my shoulders and spins us toward the doors. “Then I think we should talk about the house on the river.”
Curious, I narrow my eyes and look up. “Why?”
“Because it sounds like you should go there. It’ll be good for your soul.”
19
