My jaw wobbles.I’m such a baby! “You didn’t?”
“I slept in here.” He looks to the floor. “Close enough, I could still be with you, but not so close you’d feel smothered if you woke in the middle of the night. Now it’s…” He glances across the room and snickers. “Nearly ten o’clock, and my body is accustomed to waking at stupid o’clock. Believe it or not, but you were asleep by seven, which means I got a full twelve hours andstillhad time to get up and have a shower, and forage for meds.Andcall Tommy’s place to check in on my sisters.Andcall Janine, because she was worried about you last night, too.”
“Janine?”
“Which brings me to the one and only thing Iwasmad about last night.” He drags my blankets down my legs, with slow movements and a soft smile, then he takes my hands and carefully tugs me out of bed. He wraps one arm across my back, anchoring his hand to my hip and pulling me in close to support most of my weight. Then he leads me across the room, through the door, and into the hall where the air is clean.
Oh God. How humiliating.
“I got home last night after work and you weren’t here.”
I gulp. Groan. Whimper. “Which made you angry.”
“Scared the piss out of me.” He leads me into the kitchen and all the way across to my stool. Helping me sit, he moves to the other side and rests on his elbows, forcing his bright blue stare into my line of sight. “Scared me more than I’ve ever been scared before in my life.”
“I’m sorry?—”
“You don’t have to be sorry,” he sighs. “You did nothing wrong. You don’t need my permission to go places, Rose. You don’t need my blessing to hang out with friends or wander into town or get stupid drunk on a workday—although the latter, on a consistent basis, would be something I,as your treating physician, would advise against.” His lips curl gently up on one side. But his joke falls flat when his smile fails to reach his eyes. “You’re supposed tojustbe a guest. I’d convinced myself I was helping you out until you’d decided on your next steps. That staying here was a temporary stop before whatever comes after. But when I got home and you weren’t here, I was scared. Terrified to my fucking bones.” He lays his hand over mine, squeezing tight. “When I couldn’t find you, all I knew in my head and my heart was that you’re notjust a guest,and I’m not ready for you to go. More importantly, I didn’t know if you were okay, and that…” He shakes his head. “That terrified me.” He reaches across the counter and places his hand on a small white box. “I didn’t know where you were or if you were hurt. But I knew you had no way of calling me for help. You had no map to get home and no money to buy food while you were out. If you were injured, you couldn’t contact me. If someone was harassing you, you had no plan for a safe exit.”
His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows and takes a shiny new phone from the box. “I had a lot of time on my hands this morning, but the first thing I did, before I called to check in on my sisters, before I called Janine, before I had a shower or made a cup of coffee, was to find you a safety net.” He taps the screen and shows me the brand-new phone, with unread texts already sitting there, the ribbons open to reveal the texts from him. To me.
OLLIE
This is yours now.
My number is saved in the contacts list.
Tommy’s, Chris’, Cliff’s, Raquel’s, Eliza’s, Alana’s, and Fox’s, too.
He watches me in silence, his lashes coming down to kiss his cheeks. “I registered my credit card on there, too.”
“Ollie—”
“So if you need food, buy it. Clothes. A cab. A round of drinks at the bar if it’s your turn to buy.”
“No, Ollie. I can’t?—”
“It’s for me,” he insists. “This is how I savemysanity. It’s how I know you’re okay, so next time you decide to go on an adventure, you can do it, and I won’t lose myself to stress.” He takes the phone back, unlocks the screen, and navigates to an app. Tapping on it, he turns it around and shows me a small, round, floating image of himself. “This one tracks me, so you’ll always know where I am. If I’m at the hospital. If I’m athome. If I’m at the gym or the grocery store, or literally anywhere else. You might not care,” he chuckles. “But it’s available if you want it. Just as I’m in the contacts list. Always available.” He peeks up from beneath his lashes and meets my eyes. Then he points to a toggle in the top right corner of the screen. “This one makes it so I can track you, too. Only me. Only if you want to. It’s switched off right now, and it’ll stay off unless you decide otherwise. If you never turn it on, that’s okay. I won’t be mad. But please.” He presses the device to my palm. “Please accept this, Rose. Use it. For the love of Christ, if you’re gonna disappear, just text me and tell me you’re okay. If you’re hungry, tap it and buy some food.”
“Ollie—”
“I’ll never use this to control you or hurt you. I won’t micromanage purchases, and I won’t demand attention or full disclosure. This isn’t about knowing exactly where you are or what you’re doing or who you’re with. I just want to know you’re okay.”
Sniffling, I swipe my nose and place the device on the counter in front of me. “Okay.” I drag my bottom lip between my teeth and tremble under the onslaught of my hitching breath. “I’ll use it. But I’m adding it to my list of things to pay you back for.”
He snorts, shaking his head, then switching it up and nodding. “Fine. Whatever.” He leans closer, hovering with his lips just half an inch from mine. Waiting. But not taking. “Is the ibuprofen kicking in yet?”
I reach around and probe the back of my head. “I guess. My headache is getting better.”
“Good.” He closes the space between us and smacks a noisy kiss to my lips, following it with a slide of his tongue. “Mmm. Booze.”
“Oh God!” I shove him away, laughing and groaning and stumbling to my aching feet. “So gross. I stink. Like, there are actual, literal odor squiggles rolling off my shoulders.”
“Notliteral.” He pushes away from the counter and wraps his arms around my torso, pressing his chest to my back. Together, we step-shuffle into the hallway. “And that smell is all the alcohol trying to leave your body. A woman your size shouldn’t consume four bottles of wine in a single afternoon.”
“Leave me alone.” I lazily push his hands away.He doesn’t release me. “I’m gonna take a shower. This is embarrassing.”
“But you’re awake now, huh?” He peels my hair aside and nibbles on the back of my neck. “Conscious. Consenting?”
