“Give me two days. After that, if you want to leave and turn me in, I’ll happily go if you want me to.”
She swallowed hard, uncertainty glaring in her eyes, before she leaned forward and nodded.
“Okay.”
I sighed and closed my eyes, feeling my heartbeat slowly return to normal.
I hadn’t slept in days. Most nights, I tossed and turned, too busy worrying about Lila, or watching her on the cameras as she slept. My exhaustion ran deep as I leaned against the wall, my head lulling to one side. Lila shifted on the bed and the sound of dishes clanking made my eyes snap open. She knelt on the floor in front of me, searching through her suitcase. When she stood, her cheeks flushed as she pulled her T-shirt down to cover herself.
“Why do you do that?” I asked.
“Do what?” she asked sheepishly.
“Try to cover yourself up like you’re embarrassed.”
She chewed on her bottom lip, tugging at the dead skin. Something vulnerable slipped across her face as I reached down and grabbed her hip, massaging the bruises that my fingers had left behind.
“Because I am embarrassed,” she muttered. “My mom was always so… thin. Even before my dad left. The one thing she always knew would upset me was telling me how fat and unattractive I am.”
I glanced down, my eyes looking over every inch of her body, when I noticed scars lining her thighs. I reached down, feeling the raised edges of them, and she gripped my wrist to stop me.
“What happened?”
“Nothing,” she said, pushing my hand away. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to me.”
“It shouldn’t. It was a long time ago.”
“I want to know everything about you, Lila.Everything.”
“Thought you already did,” she said with a chuckle.
“Not everything.”
I looked up at her, feeling her shift closer to me. She dropped her clothes on the bed and took my hands, placing them on her thighs. Scars lined every inch of her skin from right below her hip to the middle of her thigh. I'd missed seeing them before, but now, next to the lamplight, they stood out against her pale skin.
“Despite having Casey to talk to, I couldn’t bring myself to tell her all of it. She had such a perfect life, a perfect family, parents who loved and adored her. I was too afraid she would leave me, too.”
I ran my hands along the raised silvery lines, feeling her shiver beneath my touch.
“When things were especially bad, or I just felt… overwhelmed with everything, I’d… cut myself. And, sometimes, I’d cut so deep or so much that I’d just sit there and watch the blood run, hoping I’d bleed out.”
Something flashed in her eyes, but it was gone just as quickly as it appeared. I pulled her close, feeling her body relax into me.
“I never wanted to die,” she whispered, her voice shaking with every word, “but I didn’t want to live either.”
“And what about now?”
“Jury’s still out on that,” she laughed, wiping away tears from her cheek.
Silence filled the room as those words hung in the air, my heart aching with every breath I took. She pulled away and picked up her clothes, holding them against her chest.
“I’m gonna go shower,” she said as she turned to leave.
I fell back on the bed and slipped my hands behind my head. My palm ached, the gash from the knife throbbing and painful. My mind drifted, remembering the moment Lila came all over the knife. My cock twitched at the memory; the way she rode it burned into my mind forever.
As I lay there replaying everything in my head, my eyes began to flutter as sleep pulled at me. I rolled over, wrapping myself in her blanket, her intoxicating scent enveloping me like a warm embrace. I sank deeper into the warmth her body had left behind, my heart full and content.
